Lost in Seoul

I had to take an ACLS class (advanced cardiac life support) class in Seoul on Thursday and Friday. Several other people from the med group got approval to stay up at the army base where the class was being held last month so I figured I would do the same. When I turned in my papers, I was denied b/c they had spent too much money on the previous groups. I didn't think much of it and figured I would just take the bus up.

The morning of the class I arrived at the bus station at 645 ready for the 7AM bus. Much to my surprise there was no 7AM bus! So that meant I had to drive up. I stopped at the ER and got directions and I was off...

I got lost on the way to the freeway and circled around for quite a while. Then I had to sit in traffic for an hour. Finally I made it, but I was 30 minutes late. Luckily the main instructor was super nice and didn't mind that I was late.

The real problems started when I had to go home...

One wrong turn and it was over...

I realized I was going the wrong way, and tried to get off the freeway. There was a freeway exit and I figured it would lead to a street where I could turn left and get on the freeway exit on the other side....nope. Didn't happen. The off ramp was actually a link to a bridge that led across the river. Once on the other side of the river I had to choose between all kinds of other freeways that I had never heard of.

I found another bridge and took that back across the river trying to get back to the 1 freeway. Long story short, I circled the river for two hours! Going back and forth, back and forth over the river. Each time I thought it was an off ramp and took it, suddenly I was on a whole new freeway.

Frantically I called the ER to talk with one of our Korean guys. I tried to explain where I was, "I am on a freeway. There are lots of Korean people all around me. I am going under a bridge right now. I am directly under the earth's sun..." Mysteriously no one could tell me where I was, and I couldn't read any of the signs to tell them where I was.

I called Joe and had him try to look at our GPS and asked him to navigate me home. This should bring anyone who knows my husband to tears b/c Joe is the worst person at directions I have ever seen. After a few minutes of talking I realized this was a lost cause.

So it was me against the road.

I am proud to say that 2.5 hours later, running on fumes in my little Kia Avella, I eventually found my way back to the 1 highway.

In Korea they have gas stations on the side of the freeway- you don't even have to exit the freeway, just pull over to it. They are kind of positioned like rest stops. I pulled into one and got gas.

3.5 hours after I left my ACLS class on Thursday, I finally arrived at home.

By then I was fuming mad that my request to stay up at the base where the class is being held was denied. Plus, I forgot to mention, there were other people from my hospital that had their requests approved, and we were in the same class. Murderous Rage building....

P90x continues...

Last night I did the Yoga workout...I hated it. I have tried in the past to like yoga, it seemed so relaxing. When we lived in S. California, I used to get up early on Saturday to make it to a yoga class. There in the 24 hour fitness group exercise room, I would stretch and breath and hold weird body positions for one hour. At the end of it I didn't feel any fitter, stretchier, or more at peace.

Finally I had to accept the fact that I don't like yoga.

I like a workout that leaves my muscles achy, my body drenched in sweat, and when I wake up the next morning I had better feel it.

The P90x yoga workout is 90 minutes! That's right, an entire hour and a half! I only made it through 30 minutes b/c I was ready to shoot myself by then. I did add in the 10 minute ab workout afterwards out of guilt.

We'll see how today goes...legs and back day.

Everland

We went to Everland yesterday. It is the Korean Amusement Park, basically it is a gigantic rip of Disneyland. They even have a version of It's a Small World.

Jordan's favorite part was the petting zoo. Joe couldn't go into the Butterfly Garden. Actually he did go in,but had to run out almost immediately. Too many butterflies fluttering around his head. For my mom's sake, I won't post those photos (she has a crippling fear of butterflies).

Now let's try that again...

Joe and I started doing the P90x workout about two weeks ago. Then I got really sick and worked everyday for a while. I did try to keep going with the workouts, but had to stop when I had a fever and nearly dropped dead when I came home.

So now that I am fully recovered, I am trying again. Tonight I resumed the workouts.

Some of the workouts are really hard. All of them are about an hour. But the results the infomercial showed really were outstanding. Plus one of the nurses I work with had great results. He highly recommended the program.

So off we embark on another fitness goal...I will be really proud of myself if I can do the first 30 days. That is my goal, complete P30x as Joe has nicknamed it...then we will worry about the next 30 days...

The most perfect B-day picture ever!

Some of our good friend's son was having his third birthday. It was kind of a big deal since I got to be at his birth! When Stacey delivered via C-section, I got to be the baby nurse! While she was being sewn back together, I got to make sure that little Elijah was doing okay.

Now that kiddo is already 3 years old! Wow how time flies!

All of the kids were excited to eat the beautiful cake, made by Dr. Sarlay's wife. I felt just awful when Jordan walked right up to it and stuck his hand in the frosting. You had to forgive him though, it was after all his time attending a birthday party

Then when Elijah blew out the candles- he spit all over the cake! You can actually see the stream of saliva pouring out of his mouth in the picture! So hilarious! Kids are wonderful!

Here are all the wives!

And all the kids! Plus two of them are missing...

Beautiful skirt giveaway!

Hey check this out! Maybe I will win it! Milk Weed Skirt

What's in the bag?

Today was a crazy day...to make matters worse this guy came in who had cut off his finger.

Surprisingly he was very calm. He was more patient that some of the coughs and colds we had waiting to be seen.

Then the most amazing thing was when we were discussing reattaching the finger- he didn't want to be a bother! He said if it was too much trouble we didn't need to bother!

The Ortho doc came down and took a look and said just to close up the skin over the bone and to let him go home. So that is what I did.

Good News!

I have nearly recovered for the worst cold I can ever remember having. It all started last Thursday and progressively got worse until just yesterday. We are talking fever, body aches, sinus pressure, coughing all night keeping everyone up, coughing so hard I vomited (all over the bed!), losing my voice...it was wonderful. Oh did I mention that I worked still, no one to cover for me :(

So today is the first day I have felt like a human being in a long time! Hooray!

Some of my faves...

I just love the internet.

I wanted to share some of my favorite sites:

Awful Plastic Surgery is one that has all kinds of celebrities and their bad surgery. Very funny!

Evil Beet Gossip has all kinds of delicious celebrity gossip.

Enjoy!

V

Do you remember that series called "V" that was out in the early 80's?

It was the highlight of my family's week! Every Friday night we would go out to eat at Bob's Big Boy. Then we would shop at Fedco and buy all kinds of yummy snacks and chocolate. Then we would rush home and watch V!

The series was about an alien race that invaded earth. At the time it was the greatest show ever! It had great special effects and the aliens would peel off their skin- it looked so real!

My favorite part of the entire thing was the routine. I liked the dinner, shopping, and then watching a show with my entire family. For evening a week we all ate together, shopped together, and sat through an entire show. There was no fighting, no interruptions. We all got along and enjoyed eachothers company.

Now that I have my own family, I wanted to recreate the experience. After years of searching for V, I found it! I bought it, I watched it...and I must say it was a bit disappointing. What seemed like the best and most realistic special effects in 1980s are just silly by today's standards. The acting is way over the top- almost like a soap opera.

Although the show itself is a disappointment, I do really like snuggling up with Joe (and sometimes Jordy too- but most of the time he runs around playing with his cars) and spending time together. Except instead of raving about what a great show it is, we laugh at how hokey it is!

I do feel very fortunate to re-create one of my favorite childhood memories...next a houseboat trip to Lake Powell!

Only one more night...

I am at the end of a 7 night stretch of working. Last night was night #6, and it did not disappoint. One alcohol poisoning requiring intubation and transfer. One sexual assault. One broken clavicle...

Now I am off to bed. I can't wait till this time tomorrow- then I can finally have my chance to be drunk and disorderly!

Life...

We had a patient come in the other night who was found down in a bathroom. I got to go along on the transport to the civilian hospital. On the way his heart stopped and we had to start chest compressions. I don't think he is going to make it.

It really made me realize how fragile life is. One minute you go to the bathroom, the next you are being worked on in a ambulance, and then you die.

Whatever you are putting off till tomorrow, next week, next month, or even next year...DON'T! Tomorrow may not come.

Tell your family how much you love them, make sure that plans are in place should something happen to you (wills, insurance..), and think about your life goals!

One of my goals in 101 in 1001 was to make a bucket list. Now seems like the perfect time:

1. See the Great Wall
2. Take a romantic trip to Italy with Joe.
3. Have a huge family holiday, sit down to a dinner with all my loved ones.
4. Take my kids (Jordan + more) camping.
5. Dance with Jordan at his wedding and tell him how happy I was when I had him.

That is all I can think of now, but I will add as more come up.

101 in 1001...

I just wanted to update everyone on the process of this list. Just a warning to everyone that I have taken half a tablet of Ambien and drank a Mike's Cranberry prior to this. But still can't fall asleep...

One of the goals was to give up paper towels. I did this for the one month time period I challenged myself too, and have to say the month was really hard. People who can do this dont' have children. Kids require so much clean up and maintenance. Stuff that I don't ever want to see again- not even to through that poopy mess in the washer! Maybe in a time of grown up children I can try this one again, but right now, NO!

Also I wondered what people who don't buy paper towels do when they fry something. What do they put it on to help soak up all that grease?

One of my goals was to play video games with Joe as a way to be interested in what he does. WE actually found a game that I was really excited about. Katie- get ready to laugh- It is LOST!! They have a game! It is really cool so far! We have a blast playing it together.

Another goal was to find 15 new ways in which I tell Joe I love him. One of those was accomplished tonight as I sat through another awful movie. We watched Watchmen- while it was not a awful movie, the movie was made awful by the theatre cuttng out about 45 minutes of it! Suddenly the movie ended abruptly and we were all confused as to what had happened! Joe went home and got on the internet and discovered we had missed a huge section!

So that is number 1- sitting through a plottless man movie.

I am happy to report that I am still a non-smoker and have no desire to ever light up again! Although that changes from day to day! Encourage your smoking friends to give it up, and if they fail, try not to judge them too harshly and encourage them to give it another shot!

Here is my full list:

1. Become a member of AAFP and complete the monthly CME quiz. (1/32)
2. Read the ER book by the time we leave here.
3. Every month while I am in the ER, draw blood and start an IV so I don't lose my skills.(3/9)
4. Go to at least 3 social events with work people before we leave here. (1/3)
5. Renew ACLS
6. Take on a new task at work.- Radiology Wet Reads while Eric was gone.
7. Once a month date night where Jordy has a sitter. (2/32)
8. Take Jordy to play group at least 10 times before we leave here. (5/10)
9. Find a wonderful daycare for Jordy once we get to Florida, one that is bilingual.
10. Work with Jordy, when he is ready, to learn spanish.
11. Take a family trip to Everland.
12. Take a family trip to Mt. Sorak.
13. Start going to church here, go at least 10 times (hey I am being realistic!) (0/10)
14. Find a church once we get to Florida.
15. Have professional pictures of us done.
16. Have a big family Thanksgiving where I do the cooking.
17. Take Joe on a romantic weekend alone.
18. Take Jordy on a camping trip.
19. Go on a cruise with family.
20. Make a letterbox and place it.
21. Make 8 weekly menu plans to alternate. (2/8)
22. Learn 5 vegetarian recipes. (0/5)
23. Learn to Eat Clean and Incorparte some of these recipes into the regular
24. Go an entire two months without buying anything for myself. (2/2)
25. Go without tv for one week.
26. Get one of my scrapbook pages published in a magazine on a website
27. Close accounts that I am not using.
28. Master Quicken.
29. Make and keep a monthly budget. (3/32)
30. Save "enough" for a down payment for a house in Florida.
31. Start saving for Jordy's College.
32. Get Joe a car when we get to Florida that isn't too outrageously expensive.
33. Get an annual credit report for both Joe and I. (1/3)
34. Start a garden to grow vegetables.
35. Start composting.
36. Have a big yard with a doggie door for Pezzy.
37. Make a cleaning schedule and stick to it. (3/32)
38. Buy Joe the tv of his dreams.
39. Have people over for a home cooked meal and a movie.
40. Get pictures from my dad, sister, and a few others to have enlarged and displayed in my home.
41. Send 5 thank you cards to people for how they have impacted my life. (0/5)
42. Test drive an extravagantly expensive sports car.
43. Get Botox.
44. Play golf for the first time, and not miniature golf.
45. Read 15 books from the library (0/15)
46. Stop swearing! This one isn't measurable, but I really need to stop being such a potty mouth.
47. Knit a sweater.
48. Participate and complete the 365 Portrait Challenge
49. Take a Class at the Community Center on making paper crafts.
50. Lasik
51. Recycle aluminum Cans Regularly.
52. Once I am doing the cans, move on to plastics.
53. Stop buying individual yogurt cups, buy the big one and put in my own reusable container.
54. Have one day per week where I don't drive and use public transportation.
55. Buy/Find enough cloth bags to use for grocery shopping. (3/10)
56. Consistently use the cloth bags when grocery shopping for one year. (0/24)
57. Donate old clothes and other things rather than throwing them away. (0/4)
58. Start using natural cleaners in my home such as Vinegar and Baking Soda and lemon.
59. Buy an Air purifier to clean out the YelloW Dust
60. Stop buying paper towels and napkins for a month. (1/1)
61. Take the clothes Jordan has outgrown to the Consigment Shop on Base.
62. Eat Sushi 10 times (1/10)
63. Go to the Seafood Festival in Florida
64. Play video games with Joe at least 5 times. (1/5)
65. Go to 10 movies with Joe, or watch pirated ones here in Korea, that Joe picks. (0/10)
66. Find 15 new ways to tell Joe that I love him. (0/15)
67. Have a spa weekend with Jennifer, my treat.
68. Visit Heidi in Kentucky and meet her family.
69. Try 10 new resteraunts. (2/10)
70. Make 100 scrapbook layouts. (5/100)
71. Go on a picnic 4 times. (0/4)
72. Draw Jordan's Family Tree
73. Make a photo book of all of Jordy's pictures.
74. Go to Disney World
75. Go to Disney Wild Animal Park
76. Get an account on Facebook
77. Watch a Marky Mark movie with Jennifer while we drink strawberry daiquiris
78. Visit the Park's in Alaska.
79. See 5 plays/musicals/concerts. (0/5)
80. Find a Charity I am passionate about and help them raise money.
81. Participate in Gimme your Stuff
82. Send PostCarts in Post Crossing (5/5)
83. Exercise for health, not to maintain some unrealistic goal for myself.
84. learn to love myself, my body, and mind, even though there are countless flaws.
85. Know that having a few jiggles here and there doesn't make me unlovable.
86. Exercise regularly 3x per week. (0/
87. Run a 5K
88. Get a perfect score on my next fitness test.
89. Laser Hair Removal
90. Do pictures for at least 5 groups of people. They can be family, wedding, kids. (0/5)
91. Stop buying bottled water. Get a filter for work so I can use a cup instead.
92. Continue to be a nonsmoker and encourage my patients to quit.
93. Have Joe and I both make "bucket lists"
94. Make a list of 100 things I love.
95. Go Hiking at least 10 times. (0/10)
96. Go to the DMZ.
97. Make Joe a new quilt.
98. Wear heels at least once per month starting in March 2009
99. Go to the Florida Keys
100. Write in my blog once per week.
101. Organize this list!

Jordy's Drive-In

Jordy went for a ride in his car outside and once we came back in he didn't want to get out. He then watched the entire movie of Cars sitting in his car! What a cutie!

Some new pictures!

Jordy's First Movie

Jordy gets a basketball hoop!

Jordy goes for the basket!

A good night at work!

The other night I had a great night at work. I actually got to do some procedures and actually did some good! After an incredibly drunken night, I got to intubate an active duty person who was puking all over the place and in danger of aspirating. To make matters worse they were combative and fighting us. I was on the fence about intubating, but since we had anesthesia right there and respirations were steadily going down, I figured we might as well. Then we wouldn't have to fight to keep them cooperative, breathing, and aspirating. Plus we got to suck all the food out of the stomach- there was puke everywhere!

Surprisingly, after not intubating anyone since the 3rd year of medical school- I got it on the first try! I was so proud! The people I work with at the ER are so nice- everyone was cheering me on, I was a celebrity for the rest of the evening!

It was a good night! I came home on top of the world and stayed up most of the day- too amped up to sleep!

You can't fight your DNA!

You can't fight your DNA, but you can try.

Every year for the military we do a PHA- periodic health assessment. This year I had to get my blood drawn (actually every year we do) for HIV and a cholesterol screening. I can't even begin to imagine all the money the government wastes every year getting HIV screenings on people like me- married, monogamous, and no new sexual partners in over a decade! I am sure you are all pleased that your tax dollars are going to good use!

Anyways, my cholesterol came back high. Total cholesterol of 207! Under 200 is "normal". I knew for a while that my cholesterol was creeping up, but thought I was doing a good job of keeping it low. Guess I was wrong.

My Triglycerides were also really high.

I am going to have to start limiting my red meat consumption, exercising more, eating fish! I love a good steak and hate fish.

I know that a large part of this is probably genetic, my mom's side of the family all had raging high cholesterol. Although I attributed their high cholesterol to their eating habits. My mom said grandma used to use bacon grease to butter her bread!

So what can be done to lower cholesterol, there are a lot- but here is what I am going to do:

1. Exercise More
2. Less Red Meat
3. Fish Oil supplements
4. Oatmeal

We'll see what happens...I will get it checked again in six months.

I did it!

Last night I was able to stay up to 3AM! Then I woke up at noon. I plan to stay up to 4AM tonight, then hopefully sleep until 1PM. By Wednesday night I will be turned around to a night schedule (I hope!).

I watched a few videos by a blogger that I love. She is a fitness and nutrition guru. There are several videos she posted on youtube about food prep. Really it is such a simple idea, I don't know why I don't do it.

She plans her meals for the entire week, grocery shops and buys those things, then does most of the food prep on Sunday for the entire week. That way there is no temptation to go to Burger King (my personal weakness) when there is no time to make dinner.

A few weeks back I was trying to come up with a similar menu planning scenario. I don't know what happened that I got derailed. Perhaps I will start again with renewed gusto!

Check out the videos and her site at Phit-n-Phat.

Must stay awake..awake..awake..

I am switching to nights on Wednesday. Unfortunately I am still on a day schedule. I had the last week off in which I was supposed to get turned around, but kept having stupid meetings to go to during the day. So alas, two days before nights begin and I am dying to stay awake!

Today I tried to make a delicious dinner, but ended up over cooking the chicken. It came out like cardboard! Seriously my jaw got tired chewing it! Poor Joe really tried to eat it, but just couldn't do it.

Oh well, I will try again tomorrow!

1st day back after vacation...

Today sucked. Just plain sucked.

I was really tired from not being used to getting up at 430 AM. I was starving and was looking forward to getting to work to have my morning coffee and oatmeal (since I get up so early I eat breakfast there), only I didn't get to eat until 9AM.

As soon as I walked in the door there was a Code Blue in progress. I walked in just as the tube went down the patients mouth. Since everyone else was doing stuff, I got stuck with the fun job of talking to the husband. Not a fun job.

Then it was pretty much nonstop all day. My morning cup of coffee which I had been really looking forward too was ruined by lack of coffee creamer. I did buy some last week at the Bx, but the only flavor they had was GingerBread- which was disgusting!

About 10AM one of the higher ups shows up and makes us all do push-ups for not having our ID badges on. So then my wrist hurts for several hours.

We had a patient with a miscarriage, a baby with a fever, insomnia, 2 chest pains, UTI, and at the end of the day I got into a fight with one of the nurses.

What a day. Thank God I have the next 7 off!

Guam pics

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Open Letter to All Travelers...

Dear Annoying Traveler,

I know that we are all in rush, but standing so close to me that I can feel your breath on my back does not make the line move any faster. In fact it makes the line move slower because in my own vengeful way, I move slower the harder you push me. Not only does crowding me make me entirely pissed off, it enrages my husband. When my husband is enraged there are consequences. Don't dismiss those evil death looks as benign, if ignored they will escalate. Let's not forget the Splash Mountain Incident where at least 10 unsuspecting crowders were bowled to the ground after Joe violently lurched backwards instead of forward when the line moved.

Like all Americans my body does not end where my skin does. I have at least 18 inches of air space surrounding me. Please respect my allotted airspace.

Now onto the next matter- airline seating. Under no circumstances are you to evacuate your purchased seat, relocate into a vacant seat infront of me holding my sleeping toddler and then have the nerve to invade the three inch cube of personal space the airline has allotted me by reclining your seat. As the paying passenger in the proper seat assigned to me, I feel that I have the right to not have your head lying on my child's head, lying on my lap!

Likewise, when you usurp the seat behind me by the same means do not call the flight attendant to complain that I have my seat reclined and you are cramped. When the flight attendant tells me, very loudly, to move my seat up for the courtesy of the other passenger- while the other idiot is laying in my lap- it really pisses me off.

All of this seating drama causes my husband undue stress. He goes into protection mode trying to preserve our "real estate". He is shoving at reclined seats, yelling at people (in English so I hope no one understands) to move back, muttering angry curse words...I expect him to stand up and start pissing on the borders of our row. By the end of the flight we are all exhausted and want to get off the plane...

But even exiting the plane is a debacle. First an almost entirely comatose cabin springs into action as soon as they hear that "ding". People are everywhere- standing in the aisles, rummaging in the overhead bins, standing in the aisles in an obvious attempt at securing a place in line to get out. Heaven forbid that they would let a family with a small child out...mind you that child is now screaming and really pissed! (By the way, the irritated looks at us while the child is screaming does not help. Don't you think if we could get him to calm down we would? We do not enjoy him making a scene anymore than you enjoy listening to it!) Would it be too much to ask that you let us out? Will the 30 seconds it takes for us to exit the row really delay your entire travel itinerary? I think not.

In conclusion you annoying travelers out there- knock that shit off and have some consideration for other people.

What is that magical contraption??

On the flight to Guam we had an entire row to ourselves- 5 entire seats! With all that kind of room we decided to take the car seat on the plane and once Jordan was asleep we could tuck him in for a nice sleep...boy were we wrong!

As soon as we got on the plane we buckled in the car seat to one of the aisle seats. Joe, Jordan, and I occupied the three seats on teh other aisle. Flight Attendant #1 (FA1) comes over to ask us if we need the seat this moment or if she could put it in the overhead bin. (Mind you that this is in very broken English and very difficult to understand). Joe and I agree we don't need it right this instant but explain it is buckled to the seat and it won't move. FA1 doesn't buy the safety of the seat and begins to pull at it violently. The seat does not budge. "Excuse a me" she pleads and scurries away. Joe and I stupidly think that will be the end of it.

FA1 returns with FA2 and FA3. They all study the seat and take turns pushing and pulling at it. FA2 musters up the bravery to ask if it is bucked to the airline seat. Yes we reply, it is infact attached and will not move unless we unbuckle it.

FA4 joins in. They talk rapidly in Korean. The four of them sound like a fight might break out between them. FA2 and 3 take turns yelling and jerking at the seat showing how it doesn't budge. They inspect the buckles that would hold Jordy. They run their fingers along the fabric. I expected one of them to climb into the carseat when finally the FA3 declares it is safe, and away they all go.

Finally the matter was settled...

Until 1 hour prior to landing...

It seemed like an entirely new crew of Flight Attendants had arrived. I don't know where the ones that we started with went? Perhaps they parachuted out of the plane, or had as suicide pact if the car seat made it off the ground...I don't know... but what I do know is that we had an entirely new crew of Flight Attendants investigating the chair again.

The only thing different about this inspection period is that I had Jordy screaming mercilessly while the FA1 demanded that the chair that the car seat was bolted too be in the full and upright position. Mind you that also at this time Joe is having a panic attack and feels he may pass out (he's not a good flier). So I yell at the FA1 to hold her horses! One of the nice things about being in a foreign country is you can say whatever you want- nobody understands if you speak quickly. Joe springs into action and unbuckles the seat entirely, but moves the airline seat to the full upright and locked position.

Now a small army of flight attendants investigate. They all agree that the chair is in the proper position. None of them notice that the car seat is not bolted down and it may jettison into the air at any time, not important...

Meanwhile, while all flight attendants are having a near coronary over the car seat reclined seat fiasco, there is a woman leaning over her seat back trying to console her baby who is sitting in her husbands lap direction behind her. She is bobbing along with all the turbulence, once even striking her head on the ceiling...not too worry though- our seat is in the full and upright locked position!!

Miraculously we landed without anyone dying d/t our car seat.

I really don't understand what the big deal was- have they never seen a car seat? Then I remember that in South Korea I once saw a woman riding a moped holding an infant in her lap! No these people don't use car seats regularly, so maybe they had never seen one!

Next time we are checking the damned thing!

Only two more days...

Only two more days and we are off to Guam! We are going for vacation. I can't wait!

I plan to sit on my butt and get a tan (although hopefully not skin cancer). There are a few things I want to see there, but mostly I am excited for American stores and resteraunts! Guam is a US territory and has tons of great stuff. Although it does not have a Best Buy, much to Joe's dismay, they do have a Kmart.

An Entirely New Outlook

So after hitting rock bottom in the self esteem department, I have decided to change my outlook.

I read a blog called Phit-n-Phat that I just love. In this particular post, Corinne talks about liking yourself. She talks about how women always focus on what we don't like about ourselves, and seem to forget that we have some really good qualities.

So I am accepting her challenge and will list some things I like about my self:

I like my teeth. I love how straight they are and how years and years of grinding my teeth has made them perfectly filed down. People often compliment me on my smile and it makes me want to flash them a huge mega watt smile!

I like my nose. This may be cheating a bit b/c I did have a nose job. But after the work was done, my nose really makes me happy.

I like that I am fairly tall. In a crowd of people I don't feel like I am a giant, but not too short.

I like my laugh. Although when I hear it recorded it sounds like an annoying cackle, but it feels so good that I love to laugh. I love to laugh so hard that I start crying and my abs hurt.

I used to love my flat tummy, but since Jordy it isn't all that flat anymore. The other day Joe pinched at my flab and teased me about it. My response- I reminded him that this body made an entire person! Yeah I may have some left over flab, but dang it- I made a human being! I love that I was able to have Jordy and recover without any problems.

Overall my body will never be on the cover of Victoria Secret, but it serves me well. It hasn't failed me yet- no broken bones, no chronic pain issues, no GI problems, nothing...I will stop wishing I were a supermodel, and realize how blessed I truly am!

Cheap Entertainment

Living in Korea has changed the way we entertain ourselves entirely! Since there are no shopping malls with stuff that interests us, no Best Buy, no scrapbooking stores, etc...we are not shopping like we used to. This is a pretty good thing as far as money goes, but the internet has thousands of places that are willing to ship to us...

Since our options for going out are so severely limited, we have found a few things to entertain ourselves. By far my favorite is Lost! We borrowed the DVDs from some friends and have been hooked! Every night when I get home from work we have dinner, then Jordy gets a bath, then straight to Lost! For several weeks I have been fairly sleep deprived b/c I end up staying up way too late!

Instead of buying 4 seasons of Lost on DVD, we borrowed them from a friend and saved at least 100 dollars. We have spent every evening for the past few weeks watching it! This great trade has made me wonder what else my friends have hiding in their DVD collections! What a great way to save money rather than buy something and only watch it once.

Usually Joe doesn't like people to borrow our DVDs (he is super paranoid about people touching his stuff!), but he will make people copies for them to take. That way I don't feel like we borrow and then never loan stuff out.

Another thing we have been doing a lot of is Jordy playgroups. At the food court on base they recently added an indoor play area. It is pretty nice and has a magazine rack filled with women's magazines like Allure and InStyle. I like to sit and read a magazine and watch Jordy play. This activity would be entirely free, except Joe likes to buy food from the food court everytime we go.. It is so much fun watching all the kids playing. They don't know not to push or hit yet, no idea what sharing is, but they all know how to cry when something doesn't go their way. It is very entertaining. Somehow everytime we go, the kids flock to Joe and I. We are the only parents who actually play with them! All the mothers just sit with the other moms and talk.

When the weather gets a bit warmer, I am looking forward to hiking in the hills behind our apartments. It is really beautiful back there, and Jordan seems to really enjoy running along the trail.

Before Jordan came along, Joe and I used to really like to go to the gym together. It was so much fun spotting for him. He makes the funniest faces while working out. Out here we can't go to the gym together since we don't have anyone to watch Jordan, but we still go. I have started going after work. It is easier for me to make it part of my work day, rather than try to make it back another time. Joe usually goes on my days off. I do look forward to getting back to the states and going to 24 hour fitness where they have a day care.

I really enjoy cooking, and trying out a new recipe is a fun way to spend the afternoon. I found a website called spark.com that has all kinds of healthy & low fat recipes. Some of them turn out pretty good. I like the crock pot ones so I can turn it on when I leave for work, and then come home to a delicious meal. Joe also gets on board for cooking sometimes. Last week he helped me make Chicken and Shrip Paella! Yummy!

Of course I love to scrapbook, so that takes up a ton of time. My only drawback here is the lack of storage space. I don't want to buy a lot of stuff to store things in here. The scrapbook room is a disaster with papers all over the place! Joe still gets his video games regularly. Right now he is waiting for the Bx to get Resident Evil. Everyday he goes to the Bx really early to check and see if it is out yet. What dedication!

Before we moved here I was working a DVD slide show of all of Jordy's first year. I didn't finish it though, perhaps I should.

After doing taxes with Katie, I am vowing to keep better records this year. I just put in a receipt to the 2009 tax file that she made for me. It was for 6.65 for uniform alterations. The old me would have thought that 6 bucks wasn't enough to matter, but we'll see what it adds up to!

I found a website called Postcrossing. It is a postcard club. I send a postcard to some random place in the world, and get some back too! Just yesterday I got one from South Africa. I have gotten about 10 postcards; from China, Thailand, US, Finland... It is free to join, and fun to do!

My point of doing this post was to remind myself, and you too!, that there are a lot of activities in the world that don't require spending money. I am just so used to shopping being my main past time, it is hard to get out of that mindset.

Any other ideas to add?

Scrapbooking!

I have been scrapbooking quite a bit in the past week. Here are a few of my layouts:

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Budgeting Lessons...AKA OH CRAP!!

My goal of making & maintaining a monthly budget went great for January, not so for February...

Previously I had no method at all. I would just pay the bills when they came in, and then check them off of a list for the month to make sure I paid them all. If we had extra money we would spend it.

My financial genius friend, Katie, helped Joe and I come up with a budget. Katie is the wife of one of guys that I work with and keeps the best financial records I have ever seen! Someday I would like to be Katie! Anyways, we did great sticking to the budget as soon as it was implemented. Joe was wonderful about not spending more than the amount he was allotted. He did spend extra a few times, but it was always to bring me lunch at work (how do you complain about that!). We were saving more, spending less, and I felt on top of our finances!

Then this month, my old habits kicked in while I was still trying to maintain the budget (Katie you should stop reading at this point...it will only disappoint you!). It all happened one day at work when I checked the exchange rate between the dollar and the won. When we first got to Korea the rate was almost 1:1. With the current economic disaster, the dollar to won is 1:1.5. Since we pay our rent in won, if we exchange money when the rate is like this we get "extra". For the last couple
months our 1200 dollar rent, has turned into 900 dollars or less per month!

So two weeks ago when I checked the rate and it was really good, I logged onto my bank account and saw how much money was there. Then I transferred 500 dollars to the bank account here to be withdrawn in won. Joe went and got the money and we had "made" extra won!

Then I got a rude awakening...an overdraft fee! In fact there were two of them, each 29 bucks!

My old way of doing the money collided with the new way! I forgot that now every dollar is accounted for. There isn't just 500 extra dollars built into the budget! That money is already earmarked for something else. Damn it!

Well even with paying the 58 dollars of overdraft fee, we still ended up ahead by exchanging when we did...but it is still infuriating!

Lesson learned...

Adventure to Coex Mall

Jordan dressed & ready to go!

Joe and I were getting pretty sick of the same old, same old. So we decided (actually I decided, and Joe accomodated) that we needed to break out of our little circle of comfort. I had heard that there was a huge mall in Seoul that had an aquarium. I imagined the Aquarium of the Pacific, which is a huge beautiful aquarium on Long Beach and thought Jordan would love it. So I found the coordinates on Wikepedia, put those into the GPS, and off we went.

The entire trip should have taken about 45 minutes driving time, but in Korea there is always so much traffic, we were in the car for two hours on the way there. In fact the top speed we reached was 25! The traffic was so bad, there were actually people selling snacks in the middle of traffic! Shockingly, people were actually buying them!

The guy infront of our car was selling snacks in the middle of traffic!

We finally made it to the aquarium, and all my hopes of a relaxing day lazily walking along looking at fish were smashed to bits! The place was so crowded! There were people bumping in to us in all directions. We couldn't get near the aquariums, which were basically nothing more than an aquarium someone would have at their house. There were a few larger ones, but not anything like what I was expecting.

There are Joe and Jordy looking at fish. This is the best picture I could get of them! Notice the lovely couple in the foreground with no regard for some one trying to take a picture!

Eventually Joe and I could stand no more! The place was roasting hot and we were both sweating, Jordy was screaming from being constantly bumped into. He started to pull anyone's hair that got to close! We found an emergency exit and used it....


Only that emergency exit led to a stair well that had all doors locked...we had to climb 4 flights of stairs (with a stroller) to get out. We finally made it out to an exterior door that dumped us on the street. We had no idea where we were...

We wandered around until we found a convention center that we thought connected to the mall. Jordan wanted to go up this escalator, so Joe took him up, then right back down...


In the mall we ate at a Japanese resteraunt. Joe had sushi and I had some tempura. I tried the sushi, but it had so much wasabi I couldn't stand it!

By the time we made it back home (another 2 hours in traffic), I was exhausted! I got right into bed and stayed there!

Buy Nothing for Two Months- Conclusion

One of my goals in the 101 in 1001 was to buy nothing for myself for two months. The other day one of my friends as why I was doing this. My answer was gratitude.

I found myself constantly wanting more. More clothes, more scrapbooking supplies, more movies, more, more, more. It didn't matter that I have a closet stuffed full of clothes, tons of scrapbooking supplies, thousands of movies, it wasn't enough. My only past time was shopping. Whenever I leave the house I always return with more stuff. In fact buying stuff was the only thing I could think to do on my day off.

For two months I wanted to not buy anything for myself so that I would realize how good I have it. I wanted to be appreciate the things that I have. Just because I don't have all the latest designer clothes or top of the line things, Joe and I live pretty comfortably and at times
lavishly.

I just wanted to force myself to appreciate my life.

The media does such a good job of telling us that we need more and that our lives will be so much better if we just get the latest and greatest products. It can be really convincing. For two months I wanted to stage my own private strike against them by buying nothing. For two
months I lived without believing that I would be a better person, be happier, be loved more, be more popular, be more fulfilled, be a better parent, be a harder worker...if I only had _____ product.

So how did it go? To be honest, the first month was a little depressing. As sad as it sounds, I actually do get a little happier when I buy new things. I look forward to getting home and playing with my new purchase just like a kid would when they get a new toy. But that happiness never really lasts long. So for the first month there were no little happy moments as I brought nothing home. Instead my life seemed a little monotonous; go to work, come home, go to work, come home.

About midway through I started to pick up my hobbies again to fill in the time. I got all my scrapbooking stuff out and made a few layouts. I emailed more often. I cleaned. I cooked a lot. I went to the gym, but only once- I should have gone a lot more. I dug in the back of my closet to find clothes I hadn't worn in a long time. In fact I found two sweaters I forgot all about!

By the end of the second month there were actually things that I needed! I desperately needed to color my hair. One morning when I pulled my hair into a pony tail, there was a gray straggler sticking straight up along my part! So I did break down and buy some hair color b/c I didn't want to pay to have someone color it.

I did cheat twice, once I bought myself a People magazine and the other time I bought some lotion that I really didn't need. Old habits die hard...

Overall I am glad that I did it, but more glad it is over!

Jordan @ Bathtime

I just love this picture of Jordy. At bathtime he gets so excited and practically rips all his clothes off! He tries to climb into the tub by himself!

Jordan @ 18 months

Jordan is 18 months old! It is amazing how fast it has gone by! It seems like just yesterday he was a little fleshy blob that we brought home from the hospital, and now he is a big boy!

At his well baby visit, he was at the 97th percentile for height, 60th for weight! I don't know how Joe and I produced such a tall little guy!

Jordy is so busy all the time. It seems like we spend our days chasing him around and cleaning up after him. Within minutes of stepping into a clean house Jordan will take all the pots out of the cupboard, roll the trash can across the room, throw all the pillows off the couch, dump water all over the floor, it goes on and on... Heaven forbid there is folded laundry nearby- it is instantly all over the floor, unfolded...

Right now Jordan is fascinated with the TV. He stands really close to it, then when something exciting happens he screams and hits the TV. It drives Joe nuts. He is sure that this will be the demise of the TV. So on the advice of Dr. Burns (pediatrician) we are trying to distract him. So as soon as he does it, we jump up, run and get him and go into another room. Once in the other room we say, "Don't hit". Then we wait 30 seconds, put him down in the other room, and move on.

A few times he has gone right back to the TV, reached out his hand while watching us to see our reaction. Then a few days ago, he hit the TV again! I pounced on him like a panther! Snatching him up and into the other room we went. I swatted his little butt, put him in his bed, and walked out of the room....then once out of sight , I burst into tears.

Joe came over and told me I did the right thing. If Jordan learns now that our rules mean nothing we will have hell to pay later, he told me.

I went back into the room and scooped him up. He sniffled as he hugged me. We came back out to the living room and sat down. He didn't go near the TV.

Taxes...

I hate taxes. For over a month I have been collecting forms and statements for taxes. I have reviewed bank statements for anything that could possibly considered tax deductible. Hours have been spent on the phone with student loan people to get info regarding interest paid...

Today I was on the phone trying to get the interest for Joe's student loan. Thank goodness the customer service rep was really nice. After a few minutes of taking Joe's info, he said, "Now you don't sound quite like the typical Joseph..."

I complimented on his keen wit. He laughed as I explained that I was Joe's wife and if it were up to Joe they would never see their money! He verified that the payments come from an account with both of our names on it.

Then very nicely he explained that because Joe had never sent them a power of attorney form he could not tell me that Joe had paid 284.30 in interest last year. If Joe had sent in that form than he would be legally allowed to tell me that a total of 284.30 had been paid, but until he received that form he could not tell me about the 284.30 of interest that he paid.

He was so nice! A rarity in todays world of rush, rush, rush to have someone who understands how it is to be a busy family. He could hear Jordy crying in the background and said, "I hope that little guy can still get some nice toys despite the 284.30 that Joe paid in interest."

I thanked him profusely and then hung up. I will eventually get that form done...

Where is your locus?

As I was talking with some friends today, I realized not everyone has an internal locus of control.

That is mumbo jumbo speak for where do you think control of your life is from. If you have an internal locus of control than you know that you are in charge of your life. You make the decisions, you call the shots, it is all about you.

A lot of people have an external locus of control. That means they feel like everything else controls their life. They are fat because their wife cooks fatty meals. They don't exercise because the kids won't let them. Basically everything wrong with their lives is someone else's fault.

It is usually easier to notice the faults in others than it is in yourself. As I sat listening to all the reasons my friend couldn't do something, I started to space out thinking about all the things I let control me.

I haven't been working out because I was worried Joe would be upset. I haven't been eating good because.... Basically, I was letting go of my locus. Letting other people and things control me.

Today I decided to take charge. Take back my locus!

Where are you letting other people control you? Do you naturally have an internal or external locus? How do you keep balance? How can you change it?

Thanks!

Thanks to everyone who left such encouraging comments when I was feeling so down. I have decided to take action.

Yesterday was to be the first day of the new me...

I was scheduled to take a ACLS class up at the Army Hospital in Seoul. To get there I have to take a one hour bus ride. It was pouring rain the entire drive. Koreans like to blast the heaters, and I made the mistake of sitting right over the heater. I was seriously sweating by the time we got there.

Once on Yongsan, I got in a taxi to take me to the other side of the base near the hospital. In the hospital I had to ask for directions to another building. I braved the rain again to find the right building. I finally found the right building, right room, but no one was there. I waited about ten minutes and a lady showed up. I explained why I was there, and she explained that the class has been...CANCELLED!!

I showed her the email I had from just ten days ago telling me when and where the class would be. The email was from her. Apparently when it was cancelled one week ago, she didn't think it was necessary to email everyone on the class list.

Fuming mad, I left. Not before she gave me a list of next months classes.

I took another taxi back to the bus station. Got on the next bus, and back to Osan. I called my boss, and told him what had happened. He called me back in a few minutes to let me know that another doc from our hospital was there too. Somehow he got "squeezed into a 10 o'clock class". That lady didn't even tell me about the ten o'clock class. My boss wanted me to go to that one. By that time I was already on the bus, on the freeway coming back.

On the way back I was starving at ate two chocolate covered oreos. So much for the diet!

The rest of the day pretty much sucked too. I came home and wanted to take a nap, but ended up sleeping from 10 to 3pm.

I did manage to workout though. I did one of my DVDs. It is one of the Jillian Michaels (biggest loser trainer) ones. The workout is pretty good, but she really wears on my nerves. I just turn it on and mute her.

Today I am really sore. I think I overdid my first day. But it is a good kind of soreness. Today my eating was pretty good, but I don't think I drank enough water. Too many cokes...

Come on People!!

I think that the tv conversion fiasco is a social commentary
about the ability of Americans to plan.

For over a year we were told that the tv conversion would take place
early this year. An entire year of hearing commercials to get a
converter box, get a coupon for the converter box, buy a new tv...and so
on. But now the date has arrived and somehow after a year of warnings
the public is blindsided by the news that their analogue television set
will no longer work.

Then people are complaining about the money it will cost to buy a
converter box. Seriously?? The cheapest converter box I found was about
50 dollars. With the coupon you can get giving you 40 dollars off, the
box will cost you 10 bucks. Do you mean to tell me that in an entire
year, you can't scrape together 10 dollars?

What the hell is wrong with people. They are whining the government
needs to provide them with the converter box. Why doesn't the
government also step in and provide them with a 42" plasma tv and a 3
bedroom house to watch it in?

Disgusting...

It is late at night, I can't sleep...this is why.

I am so disgusted with myself.

I am so fat these days. I feel like a whale. Somehow I find some way to sabotage myself. Instead of going to the gym, I eat.

Part of it is guilt. I feel guilty that I work so much so I come rushing home trying to spend time with Jordy. I feel guilty that Joe is home alone with Jordy all day and want to come rushing home to help out. Joe never gets to get out of the house so it is so unfair that I would get gym time.

Then the diet thing is so rough. I want to eat 24 hours a day. Seriously I am a bottomless pit. It's not that I am eating like a horse, I am eating crap! The other day at work I ate pop tarts- one of the most unhealthy things on the planet. When I am at work I eat pretty much non stop.

The other thing that is really bothering me is that my skin is looking terrible. It is like a million wrinkles appeared overnight! Seriously where did they come from? It is like my face said one day- lets look like an 80 year old woman from now on! I don't know what to do! I take good care of my skin- washing, moisturizing, night cream....what else can I do? Perhaps I will just get into my time machine....

Another thing...I am turning into a troll! For several years I have had a "man hair" growing out of my scar on my chin. I was okay with that b/c I blamed it on the nature of the scar. Joe did a good job of plucking it for me for several years. But then at work the other day- I found another one!! Sweet merciful crap! Why is this happening to me!

Everyday I wake up and think, "This is the day. This is the day that I am gonna get on track and eat right and exercise." Then I eat like a pig, sit on the couch for hours, and feel like crap. Why do I do this to myself?

Is it just me or...?

Is it just me or is the media in love with Obama? I was too busy with school when George Bush took office, so I don't remember if he got the same amount of coverage during the first 100 days. Was it this insane though? And who knew that Obama was a smoker? Crazy!!

Seriously the news is acting like Brad Pitt took office. Every move is documented, every resteraunt they go to...insane.

I think that the media is only making this economic crisis worse- seriously after a hour of watching the news I never want to spend a cent again. I have been thinking about buying a chunk of land to build a fort on where we can grown our own food and self sustain. We will be a fully functioning society...

Did anyone see the octuplet mother? First, I want to know how much plastic surgery that woman has had. That is not her real nose or lips! She is seriously delusional if she thinks that people are judging her b/c she is a single mother! If a single woman wants to have a baby- that is just fine! But a single woman who decides to have 14 children and thinks, no believes, that she will be able to be a good mother to all of them is just plain stupid. I heard that her goal is to hold each of the newborns for 45 minutes a day- that would take 6 hours!! What about other kids? What about eating, showering, working? There is no way that one person could do this. Why should the taxpayers have to pay for her bad decisions while she plays the Old woman in the Shoe?

Remember me how I am...filled with Murderous Rage

It has not been a good week...

The other morning I woke up at 2AM and couldn't get back to sleep. After laying there for two hours, I just got up and went to work- a whole hour early. At least at work I could get a few things done. My sleep cycle has been so messed up since switching back to days. By the time I get home I am exhausted. I have fallen asleep on the couch trying to talk to Joe.

So after getting to work a hour early, I took an Ambien and slept until 430 the next night. I got up, took a shower, and then read some email and drank coffee. It was an lovely morning, until I realized I couldn't find my wallet.

After a desperate search, no luck. Joe joined in the search, and nothing. So without my wallet, ID card, or cash...off to work I went. I had to stop at the security gate and explain to them what happened...anyways I was still on time for work thank goodness.

I walked in to the ER not realizing I didn't have my "cover" (hat to regular people) on. In the military a naked head is a no no.

Then I got into work and had no ID card to log in to the computers. I could do nothing.

Then their was some drama over a guy who had broken his wrist and I had the tech place a splint on him...drama drama drama. By the time it was said and done I wanted to run away from this base and hospital and never come back again.

So when they needed an extra body go navigate on an ambulance run to Ajou hospital, I jumped at the chance. The patient we were transporting was a man who I had seen about six weeks ago who had a raging case of gangrene (rotting flesh) on his toes. I explained to him six weeks ago that this needed to be taken care of immediately. Of course he followed none of my instructions, and came back with a progressive necrosis (rotting) of his foot. I think that they may amputate his foot. When he was here last time he said it was too expensive to get an off-base provider as a retiree. I asked him if he liked his leg and foot. I explained that it was a matter of time before he started losing pieces of his lower extremities. So when he came back I wanted to kill him myself.

I was so excited to be going to Ajou. At least I would get to be out and about for about three hours on the transport....then they found a driver who knew where the hospital was so they didn't need me anymore. I nearly cried. I just wanted out of there so badly.

Eventually the time did come that I got to go home. It was glorious. I had the next two days off...or so I thought- this is where the murderous rage comes in!

Yesterday I had to go to a two hour staff meeting for the ER in which no useful information was disseminated.

Then today I got to attend the most horrible lecture I have ever been too. It was six hours of "this is a material safety data sheet, in this square....blah...blah..."

It was painful. The sad part is the guy who gave the lecture was some big shot specialist who was flown over from the states to teach this info. He was awful! Mumbled, didn't use the microphone, rambled, read boring articles....AWFUL!!

So for my two "days off" I had to spend 8 hours at work. Wonderful....murderous rage building...

Direct TV Campaign of Terror

I regret to inform everyone that my "Campaign of Terror" against Direct TV has been shut down before it really got off the ground.

Why those bastards just don't know how to play hardball... After three measly little phone calls they actually send the check!

I know you are shocked as well as I was. But finally we got the check from those idiots.

Joe and I have vowed to never do business with them again. I would advise others to do the same.

Direct TV

Dear Direct TV:

While my husband and I lived in Nebraska, we enjoyed having your excellent satellite service. We always had a crystal clear signal and thousands of options of programs to watch. Unfortunately the Air Force decided to send us to South Korea, where you do not have service.

When we notified your company in August that we were moving due to a military move, you were so understanding. You assured us that we would not be billed the 150 dollar cancellation fee since we were cancelling due to a military move. When two weeks later we got a 150 dollar bill for cancelling our service, you only made us spend 3 hours on the phone talking with supervisor after supervisor. Eventually we were threatened with being sent to collections, so we paid it.

My husband was persistent and eventually talked with a customer service rep who reversed the charge in early September. She assured us that a check would be in the mail within two weeks. Alas, it has been nearly six months and no check.

Despite the "backup in you billing department" we have received 4 statements showing that we have a 150 dollar credit. After three phone calls to your representatives, we have been assured that the check is in the mail.

To make matters worse, almost every morning we receive a call from Direct TV trying to get us to come back. Everyday we explain that we do not live in the service area and are assured that we will be removed from the calling list.

I don't know what is more frustrating; your company holding 150 dollars of my money hostage or your company throwing it in our face that we don't have satellite television anymore.

Believe me, we would love to have your service again! We are being tortured with Korean television! It only infuriates us more to have constant calls trying to get us back when that is an impossibility at this point.

Please refund our money immediately. I think that six months is more than ample time to issue a check. In addition please stop calling us trying to get us to come back. If my husband receives one more of these calls, I fear his head may explode.

I will be sure to share with my other Air Force members the kindness and excellent service you have provided to the Airmen who are defending our country.

Sincerely,

Angry Airman Trapped in Korea

The One-Upper, The Corrector, and others

I hate One-Uppers. You know these people and probably can name one right now. These are the people that no matter what you have going on in your life, they have it better, bigger, richer or alternatively they could have it worse, smaller, poorer depending on what situation you are in. For example: I have a headache. The one-upper would chime in that you don't even know a headache until you experience the migraines that they get. Or they may insist that they actually have a brain tumor.

The other person I hate is The Corrector. This is the person that no matter what you say they begin their response with, "Well, not exactly. It's more like this..." Equally frustrating. For example: The sky is blue. The Corrector will respond, "Well, not exactly. I would call it more of a peuce." To that I respond, Screw you.

Joe and I regularly encounter the "Can't get a clue guy". This guy is someone that has no idea that you can't stand him. Somehow after months of avoiding his calls, making vague answers to repeated interrogations about our schedules, and pretty much avoiding him at all costs, still has no idea that we don't want to see him. He comes right up to us and start trying to make plans, "What about tomorrow, are you busy tomorrow, what about the next day, oh, well how about three weeks from Thursday?" Unfortunately since Joe is so nice, and I only have two modes of operation- nice and complete bitch, we avoid telling him the truth. How would the truth even go? Listen, I am sure you are completely wonderful human being, we just don't care and hate you anyways. That wouldn't go over good.

Before you think that we are completely awful people, let me tell you a few things about "Can't get a clue guy". He talks non-stop about cheating on his wife. Not to me of course, but to Joe. He tries to get Joe to check out other women. So that is why we avoid him.

The final person I will rant about is the "I want to talk person". This person finds an unsuspecting victim and then ignores all social clues that that person is not interested in talking and opens up full force. For example: I am sitting down studying when someone approaches. "What are you doing?" the ask.

"Studying." Brief one word answer, highlighter in hand, obviously I can't be bothered.

"Wow, I don't know how you do it. Studying is really hard. Back when I was in school I had a hard time focusing, I just wanted to talk with my friends, and boys...boys were a huge preoccupation. I guess that is how I ended up pregnant and unmarried. As soon as that pee stick had a plus sign, he was long gone..."

"Ummhmmm". Trying not to engage. Avoiding all eye contact. But to no avail, she continues...

"After the 4th fatherless child was born, I decided it was time to nip this thing in the bud. I had all my girly parts ripped out...yup nothing in there anymore.."

"Wow that is wonderful. I gotta get going." Now gathering all my items into my bag.

"Really so soon, we were having such a good time talking."

Seriously, how can you been that oblivious? Didn't she see all the evasive maneuvers I was using? Didn't she see my eyes glaze over as I wished for death? What is wrong with people?

Oh, I found this funny video on youtube while finding the other one. It is totally unrelated, but funny.

Signs you are watching too much Friends...

For our 7 year anniversary in October, Joe got me the entire series of Friends. I have been watching it pretty much nonstop since then. This morning I realized when I dressed Jordy up ina sweater vest that he looked like Chandler...




Can't you just hear Jordy saying, "Can I be any more of a dork?"

He kept pulling at it trying to tear it off.

Finally he embraced his inner Chandler...

Ahhh Crap!!!

I just realized I was supposed to go to this military training yesterday. I completely forgot. Working Nights completely sucks, I can't keep track of time and lose days at a time.

Hopefully I won't get in trouble...

Stupid Things I have done...

As I was sitting here reading through other people's blogs and eating grapes, I remembered something really dumb I did that almost killed me.

It was when I was on a rotation in Ohio. I was in my hotel room alone eating grapes and watching tv. When I eat grapes I like to cram a ton into my mouth and mash them all up and eat them. Well you can probably see where this is going, I nearly choked to death.

I crammed probably close to 10 grapes in my mouth, felt on slide down my throat and get stuck, then couldn't breath. I jumped up, adrenaline flowing, ran into the chair at the desk, thrusting my abdomen at it like I had seen on tv once. After what seemed like a lifetime I was in so much pain from ramming the chair into myself, and feeling lightheaded from the lack of oxygen, finally it came out- along with all my stomach contents.

Disgusting. How stupid can I be?

But as I recollect on my near death experience, I am cramming grapes in my mouth again...

Winter Wonderland, just stop already!!

I am so sick of living in the cold! The last few days we had a huge snow storm. The base was actually shut down and only emergency vehicles were allowed to drive. Because of that I wasn't able to get home after work on Saturday morning- and had to stay on base. I got about 3 hours of sleep Saturday, had no shower, no food, then returned to work Saturday night exhausted.

Thank goodness we were completely slow. We spent most of the night watching Lipstick Jungle that one of the techs had downloaded on her computer. I was able to sleep a little- not enough though.

Joe came and picked me up Sunday morning b/c the roads were too awful to brave in my tiny car. I came home and slept for almost 24 hours. Jordy was pretty excited to see me! It made me feel great!

Joe taught him to blow kisses! So adorable.

Only two more nights to work till I am back on days! HOORAY!

This is getting painful!

Update on 101 in 1001:
So far I haven't bought anything for myself for the entire month of January. This does exclude food of course.

My real weakness is online shopping. Right now I am dying b/c there are all kinds of sales that I can't get in on!

There are clearance sales at Victoria Secret that are just killing me. They have this gorgeous convertible dress on sale:

I have been looking at this dress forever. It is so pretty and versatile (you can wear it 7 different ways!). Now don't think I am delusional, because I do recognize that I will not look as fabulous as this model in it. But gosh darn it- I will feel good in it! And remember I got this flab by making a person! Remember that will ya!

Since not buying stuff for myself has been one of my goals, I am doing pretty good. Joe has even cut down on spending this month. I think that for the first time we will come really close to meeting the monthly budget. Shocking I know...I almost heard Katie fall over from amazement and wonder! Seriously though, Katie is the woman! She got us all turned around! It is such a good feeling knowing that our money is being used appropriately and we are just blowing every month.

So for now, no pretty dresses, no strappy sandals, no designer bags for me. I am saving all my money for a new house in Florida. Of course once we get there I will be wearing rags, dirty and stinky from not having showered (read previous Post).

Not buying anything for two months (only a few weeks in) and I have already learned how little we need to survive. As long as we have food, shelter, and eachother, nothing else matters. Although things are much nicer if we have a good tv, DVD player, a Wii, Playstation 3, and a lightening fast internet connection. Oh and an good heater and water heater. Boy do I miss the states!

"Cold is when your shampoo freezes"

Joe's Stepdad, Reese, always says "You don't know cold until your shampoo freezes". And up until very recently I didn't know that kind of cold...sadly I do now.

In Korea they don't have heaters like we think of heaters. There is no such thing as forced air. Our heater is actually under the floor. It takes at least three days for the house to warm up, and heaven forbid that you overheat it b/c then you will be roasting the next three days while it cools down.

In the bathrooms the floor isn't heated. To make matters worse, the drains do not have J-pipes in them. I didn't give a rat's ass what this meant until someone explained that this means there is no water seal locking in heat and keeping out mosquitos (as we experienced in the summer). Long story short- our bathrooms are freezing!!

I have an embarassing confession- I have only been showering about once per week! Before you judge me would you want to? As soon as I open the door to the bathroom, cold air smacks me in the face. The tile in there is so ice cold I have to walk on towels otherwise my feet my freeze to the floor. Then it takes at least 5 minutes for the hot water to kick in, then for 30 seconds it is showering bliss with warm water. Then the water turns back to ice. Meanwhile while I am dodging icicles being shot at me from the shower head, I try to squeeze out some shampoo only to realize that the shampoo is frozen. It is seriously like a slushee!

I did my best to wash up, but seriously I was so frozen I didn't care. I jumped out and vowed to never go back. So what if I am known as the stinky doctor at work- maybe less people will come in on my shift!

4am and I'm up...

I couldn't sleep. I don't really know why, but after about three hours of sleep- pop- my eyes were wide open and I couldn't go back to sleep.

I read a really funny blog this morning about Obama's Inauguration. It is hilarious!

All joking aside, today is an exciting day. Today the first African American President will take the reins of the most powerful nation on earth. Today our nation is taking a giant step forward in Civil Rights. Obama has proven that it does not matter the color of your skin, you can do anything with hard work and perseverance.

I only wish that my paternal grandfather were alive to see this day. The day that a black man was sworn in as the President of the United States. Yes what joy I would have in watching my hateful racist bastard of a grandfather clutch is heart in shock, then keel over and die. Oh what a day it would have been. But unfortunately he died just one year ago, missed the whole event. What a shame.

This is Jordy visiting me at work. He loves to run around the ER. For a while he was yelling out what sounded like orders while standing in the trauma bay. I like to imagine he is practicing for when he is a doctor. Although I am not really sure if I would recommend to him to be a doctor. As long as he is as happy as he is in this picture- I don't care what he does!

PPS??

Is there such a thing as PPS? Parent Protection Services?

If there is, I need to place a serious phone call. Our little angel, Jordykins, constantly beats us up!

He comes over with a sweet little grin, all ready to play, then flog us repeatedly with one of his toys. The worst one I have received was with a Simpson Toy. I didn't see it coming when Ralph sped towards my head doing at least 100mph. He made contact just above my left eye brow. Now this was about 5 weeks ago, and my head is still sore in that spot.

My personal favorite, however, is being peacefully asleep and being woken up by a television remote smashing into my skull repeatedly. Nothing gets the juices flowing in the morning like a good concussion.

Joe has many more tales to tell. My personal favorite is the nose story. Joe was asleep when Jordy thought the best way to wake him up would be to stick his little fingers into Joe's nose. Once as deep in there as he could manage, he rakes his finger nails down the side. Joe woke up to blinding pain and a nose bleed. Oh what fun and merriment ensued.

We have tried to teach Jordan to be nice, to be gentle, but nothing seems to be sinking in. Joe used to get annoyed with the dogs, but now remembers that Pezzy got the concept of "nice" in one afternoon. Poor Jordy still hasn't caught on... Any advice for two battered parents?