Who is the military stylist?

Me in my Chem Suit- As you can see Jordy
is so happy to be seen with me in it!

During the exercise I have to wear tons of clothes. I wear my regular work uniform (the camouflage get-up), then over that a really thick pair of pants and a jacket. Then a FLACC vest, which has metal plates in it incase I get shot (usually those aren't in though, b/c if they are in I can hardly move). Instead of the regular helmet I wear a kevlar helmet that is also really heavy. It seriously takes me at least 15min to get dressed an undressed.

This stylish outfit also comes with several fashionable accessories. The reflective belt, which can be seen blinding you in this picture, is a must for every on the go woman. In addition rather than a regular belt buckle, why not use this gigantic pouch which snaps right on to your flacc vest. Every woman must have a sexy pair of shoes, well this outfit has two! Not only do you get to wear a sexy pair of combat boots, but how about wearing a gigantic pair of rubber boots over those! Oh the sex appeal of this outfit is outrageous!



Here we have the male version of this outfit, modeled by Trent. Here you can see the gas mask on his left hip and enormous back pack. Does it get any cooler than this?!

Seriously though, over the last few days at work we did have some fun. Despite the exercise we had some good times-


Here is Travis demonstrating how these seemingly normal paper bags can decontaminate you should you become chemically contaminated.

Here is Eric and I. Incase there is any confusion (as there was that day), I am the Real World Doctor of the Day & Eric is the Exercise Doc. Apparently Eric being all suited up did not make it obviously apparent that he was the Exercise guy.

Here is Eric, showing real passion and enthusiasm over an exercise patient.

In our downtime we did some mock-codes. I did my best to bring
this dummy back to life. No luck :(

This last picture is the only one of a "real" patient. This poor guy was walking back to his room and slipped on a patch of ice, fell backwards, and cracked his head open on the pavement. We stapled him back together again.

So tired....

I have worked 6 out of the last 7 days. 72 hours. Nights. Please just kill me.

This has been a hell of a week. The exercise is in full swing. I am wearing almost every article of clothing the military has ever given me. It takes me about 10 minutes to get dressed, and that is just putting on clothes!

Earlier in the week while I was sleeping Joe came into the bedroom whispering saying there were two women out in the living room praying.

It thought I had misunderstood him, but he reiterated and assured me they were there and now he couldn't get rid of them. Apparently they had buzzed on the outside door and wanted into the building. Joe went out and let them in b/c it was snowing, and then they followed him in to our living room, kneeled on the floor and started praying.

I got up and went out to the living room and told them women that there was a misunderstanding and they would have to leave immediately. They knodded and looked like they were leaving.

I got back in bed, Joe didn't come back to the bedroom so I called him...no answer. I listened really close and damn it, those women were going on and on about an earth mother, earth father, heavenly mother, heavenly father...

I jumped out of bed, pissed. In the living room there was Joe, the women reading out of the Bible, and Jordy (who was having a great time!).

"You have to leave." I explained. No one budged. Am I invisible I wonder?

"In heaven there is a heavenly mother..." The lady babbled on, oblivious that I was even there.

Joe is starting to get that worried look on his eye. This is the look that he gets whenever he knows I am about to entirely lose my shit and he is going to be really embarassed.

"I don't think you heard me," I said a bit louder. Nothing. "You need to leave. I work nights and have to sleep. You are making too much noise." The lady kept reading her bible. Joe is panicking. The other woman with the reading lady is looking like a deer in headlights. The situation is growing tense. Jordy is smiling and laughing, clapping his hands- yes storytime brings out the best in him.

Finally I lost it...I clapped my hands together loudly, "Let's move it people!" I screamed. I grabbed the Bible readers arm and steered her towards the door. Surprising she hardly budged. "YOU NEED TO LEAVE" (before I kick your ass, I wanted to add). She smiled a sarcastic smile and said okay. I slammed her Bible shut, shoved it at her, and escorted her to the door, with her little friend.

Finally they were outside, she turned and tried to say something else to me. I slammed the door and deadbolted it.

What the hell was that all about?? Does she really think that by staging her own sit in she will save souls? The only thing she accomplished her was a good lesson for all of us not to let strangers into our homes. At one point I actually thought I would have enjoyed being robbed more.

Be careful...they are out there...

Another Scrapbook Layout

This is a layout from a trip we took to Seoul. The trip was with ITT (the base travel agent). They schedule all kinds of tours and trips. Honestly the trip wasn't all that fun. Joe was pretty exhausted, Jordy was too. Eric and Robert also went along on the trip (two other docs from the ER) and they both slept almost the entire time on the bus.

This was the first time I saw street vendors selling the silk worm larvae though, and that is one memory that I will never forget...

Incase you didn't know...

I am a scrapbooking addict.


This is the page from Residency Graduation from the Air Force.



The other side of this layout is one of those pocket pages. It is easier than making an entire layout b/c you don't really have to crop the pictures, but the page still loos pretty nice. Plus, I used my stamps. I usually have a hard time coming up with uses for my stamps!

My favorite part of the layout is all my classmates having their names labeled.

Is this ever going to end?

I have an awful confession to make....Jordy still sleeps with us most of the time...a lot of the time....okay damn it! If I am coming clean I will just do it! Jordan ends up sleeping in our bed ALL THE TIME!

When he was about 4 months old, I started back on the inpatient service at the hospital and couldn't deal with him waking up every two hours to nurse. I was exhausted! There was no way that I could wake up every two hours and feed him, then get up at 5AM to go round at the hospital, then work until 6PM come home and do it all again. I was sooooo tired.

Joe and I agreed then that we would make him start sleeping in his own bed. For one terrible night we listened to him scream bloody murder for about 4 hours. It was awful. We eventually went downstairs and huddled together around the baby monitor. I cried, Joe cried. We felt just awful. But in the morning Jordy still liked us! He was fine all the next day. The next night we did it again, only when we put him in bed, he rolled over and went right to sleep.

Things were glorious for about two months. Jordy was sleeping like a champ in his own bed, and Joe and I were well rested normal humans again.

Then we decided to go to California to visit family. This one week of vacation permanently destroyed Jordy's sleeping schedule. The time change was hard, we couldn't let him cry b/c we were staying with family, and when we returned to Nebraska things never really got back on track.

Fast forward over a year later, yes that is right A YEAR!! I keep trying to repeat the magical solution of letting him cry for one night, but Joe, having been traumatized by the first time, can not do it!

When we put Jordy down and he cries, Joe makes a mad dash in there like the kid is on fire! Once he goes and picks Jordy up, it is over. The little guy is attached to him like glue. Then before you know it, he is in our bed ripping out my hair at the root and kicking Joe in the pills.

It is even worse now that I am working nights. I am not there to even give Joe a scowl when he goes in there. When I get home from work, I have to fight Jordy for my side of the bed.

Don't get me wrong, I love snuggling with my little Jordykins. I love how warm he is, and all the cute little noises he makes. I love how he breaths, and how he smiles in his sleep. Sometimes he even lets out little giggles. And sometimes, yes it's true, I end up getting him and not Joe.

But now I am starting to become afraid. I picture Jordan being 15 and still in our bed. Tonight I am home, Joe is asleep in our bed, Jordy woke up and Joe jumped up and got him. I took him and returned him to his own bed. He did cry for about 10 minutes total, but now is resting comfortably.

I think I will have to send Joe away for about a week to get the whole sleep schedule down, then I can reintroduce Joe to the mix.

Any suggestions? How on earth do other people do this?

Now this is really scary!!

I just finished watching I.O.U.S.A.

It is really scary to think of what may happen, or rather what will happen.

Please watch it! There is a 30minute version online you should watch!

Only 6 more weeks...

Okay not buying anything for myself for two entire months is really really hard. I keep coming up with all sorts of devious ways that I could get something that I "need". I thought about continually mentioning to Joe that I need a pair of gloves to prevent my hands from getting frostbite and then requiring amputation so that he would feel prompted to go buy me some gloves. Clearly this would be a manipulation of his tiny man brain (just kidding, his brain isn't tiny, or rather it is- he has a surprisingly small head for someone as smart as he is).

I have improved in my website browsing though. Amazon is definitely on my list of do not visit sites. Mostly I have been reading a lot of saving advice and dreaming of houses that I may someday be able to live in.

In my perusal of blogs I came across an interesting post on homeade cleaners. Interestingly this was one of my goals in my 101 in 1001 (goal #58 to use natural cleaners).

I also found another post, sorry I didn't save that link, about all the uses for bar soap. The author used it for everything from washing clothes to brushing her teeth (seriously!, brushing her teeth). It got me to thinking, why are we so brainwashed to think that we need a different soap for dishwashing, clothes washing, and all other kinds of washing. For face and body soap, I can understand that bar soap may be too drying- but does it matter if your clothes get too dry? Most of us use fabric softener anyways-

OH that reminds me. I found a site that recommended rather than buying fabric softener to take cheap conditioner and dilute it. They said you can use it the same as fabric softener for a fraction of the price. Interesting...I will let you know how it turns out.

Well all of these ideas are wonderful, but they still have to pass the Joe test. If a cleaner, food, or other product does not have a name brand slapped to the side of it Joe automatically declares it is inferior and refuses to use it. Then he will go out, behind my back mind you, and buy all kinds of name brand cleaners. What he doesn't realize is that having a closet packed to the brim of name brand cleaning supplies does not do any good if you do not use them!

Oh Happy Day!

I took boards on December 4th, while we were in Hawaii. Truth be told, I didn't feel very good about it. There was so much that I was just flat out guessing on. I was really scared about getting the results.

For the last week I have been obsessing over it, freaking out, and basically losing it. Just ask Joe, he will attest to my craziness!

Finally today the results were out- I passed.

Thank God!

I am don't have to take that stupid test again until 2015!

We did it!....kind of...

One of my goals for my 101 in 1001 was to go on a date night every month with Joe where we get a sitter. (Heidi please refer to the link to get the low down on 101 in 1001).

Well tonight was the first date night where Joe and I left Jordy with a sitter. In preparation for leaving Jordy with someone other than my mom or Trent's family, I did a lot of investigation. I found someone who has three kids of his own, three grandchildren, is an excellent ICU nurse who is up to date on all pediatric emergencies. If anything happened to Jordy, this man would know what to do.

I felt pretty good leaving Jordy with the sitter. Joe wasn't as sure, and nearly broke into tears when we left. Jordy of course was crying and clinging to our legs...

We made it to the movie theatre and apparently I had read the schedule wrong because I thought we were going to watch the Benjamin Button movie, but instead got stuck watching the worst possible movie two parents could watch after leaving their child alone with a practical stranger...."The Changeling".

Incase you haven't heard of it, which I hadn't, this is the terrible tale (true story mind you) of a woman who has her beautiful son kidnapped while she is away from the house for just a few hours. She then embarks on a heart wrenching journey to find him. Finally the police bring back a kid and she hopes it is him, it's not. Then the police think she is crazy, she gets locked up, then released once it is found that there is a crazy maniac who is chopping up little boys into bits. Some of the images were quite disturbing and I thought I would have to leave.

Surprisingly we made it through the movie. Once the final credits ran, Joe and I jumped out of our chairs and made a mad dash back to our apartment to snatch little Jordy up and hug him tight. Of course our sitter wasn't a crazed maniac, but after two hours of watching innocent little boys get brutally murdered and a poor mother screaming "Where's my son"- who wouldn't get a little paranoid.

As I type now I am tempted to go get Jordy out of his bed and snuggle him tight.

Anyways, next month maybe I will find something else for Joe and I to do on our date night! But I will update my list:

7. Once a month date night where Jordy has a sitter. (1/32)

Buy Nothing for Two Months

It has only been 6 days and this has been really difficult. I don't know how I will continue on. There all kinds of things that I keep thinking about that I really NEED!

Okay I don't need any of these things, as they are not food, shelter, or other life preserving items. More of comfort really.

One of the things is a pair of gloves. It is so cold here in the mornings when I leave work. When I am driving my hands feel like they are frozen into position.

Then while checking my email, I keep getting all kinds of sale notices. All the stores are having huge after Christmas sales. This is so painful.

I read a good posting on a blog by Frugal Dad. It kind of reminded me to be happy with what I have now. I really do have enough.

Oops!

I only put 100 goals on my list of 101!

I can't think of another one right now....I am sure one will come to me.

Any suggestions?

My 101 in 1001

So everyone else is doing it....I might as well too- I am gonna start 101 in 1001.

Reading other people's goals has really inspired me to get things done too. Plus if I write it down, then I will actually get it done. There are so many things that I want to do, but never really make the time.
So here it goes....Before October 3rd, 2011, I will:

1. Become a member of AAFP and complete the monthly CME quiz. (0/32)
   
2. Read the ER book by the time we leave here.
3. Every month while I am in the ER, draw blood and start an IV so I don't lose my skills.(0/9)
4. Go to at least 3 social events with work people before we leave here. (0/3)
   
5. Renew ACLS
6. Take on a new task at work, be flight commander next time Robert is gone
7. Once a month date night where Jordy has a sitter. (0/32)
8. Take Jordy to play group at least 10 times before we leave here. (0/10)
9. Find a wonderful daycare for Jordy once we get to Florida, one that is bilingual.
10. Work with Jordy, when he is ready, to learn spanish.
11. Take a family trip to Everland.
12. Take a family trip to Mt. Sorak.
13. Start going to church here, go at least 10 times (hey I am being realistic!) (0/10)
14. Find a church once we get to Florida.
15. Have professional pictures of us done.
16. Have a big family Thanksgiving where I do the cooking.
17. Take Joe on a romantic weekend alone.
18. Take Jordy on a camping trip.
19. Go on a cruise with family.
20. Make a letterbox and place it.
21. Make 8 weekly menu plans to alternate. (0/8)
22. Learn 5 vegetarian recipes. (0/5)
23. Find and start Master's Program.
24. Go an entire two months without buying anything for myself. (0/2)
25. Go without tv for one week.
26. Get one of my scrapbook pages published in a magazine on a website
27. Close accounts that I am not using.
28. Master Quicken.
29. Make and keep a monthly budget. (0/32)
30. Save "enough" for a down payment for a house in Florida.
31. Start saving for Jordy's College.
32. Get Joe a car when we get to Florida that isn't too outrageously expensive.
33. Get an annual credit report for both Joe and I. (0/3)
34. Start a garden to grow vegetables.
35. Start composting.
36. Have a big yard with a doggie door for Pezzy.
37. Make a cleaning schedule and stick to it. (0/32)
38. Buy Joe the tv of his dreams.
39. Have people over for a home cooked meal and a movie.
    
40. Get pictures from my dad, sister, and a few others to have enlarged and displayed in my home.
41. Send 5 thank you cards to people for how they have impacted my life. (0/5)
42. Test drive an extravagantly expensive sports car.
43. Get Botox.
44. Play golf for the first time, and not miniature golf.
45. Read 15 books from the library (0/15)
46. Stop swearing! This one isn't measurable, but I really need to stop being such a potty mouth.
47. Knit a sweater.
48. Participate and complete the 365 Portrait Challenge
49. Take a Class at the Community Center on making paper crafts.
50. Lasik
51. Recycle aluminum Cans Regularly.
52. Once I am doing the cans, move on to plastics.
53. Stop buying individual yogurt cups, buy the big one and put in my own reusable container.
54. Have one day per week where I don't drive and use public transportation. (0/
55. Buy/Find enough cloth bags to use for grocery shopping. (0/10)
56. Consistently use the cloth bags when grocery shopping for one year. (0/24)
57. Donate old clothes and other things rather than throwing them away. (0/4)
58. Start using natural cleaners in my home such as Vinegar and Baking Soda and lemon.
59. Instead of Air Filters that consume energy, I will buy houseplants that clean the air for free.
60. Stop buying paper towels and napkins for a month. (0/1)
61. Take the clothes Jordan has outgrown to the Consigment Shop on Base.
62. Eat Sushi 10 times (0/10)
63. Go to the Seafood Festival in Florida
64. Play video games with Joe at least 5 times. (0/5)
65. Go to 10 movies with Joe, or watch pirated ones here in Korea, that Joe picks. (0/10)
66. Find 15 new ways to tell Joe that I love him. (0/15)
67. Have a spa weekend with Jennifer, my treat.
    
68. Visit Heidi in Kentucky and meet her family.
    
69. Try 10 new resteraunts. (0/10)
70. Make 100 scrapbook layouts. (0/100)
    
71. Go on a picnic 4 times. (0/4)
72. Draw Jordan's Family Tree
73. Make a photo book of all of Jordy's pictures.
74. Go to Disney World
75. Go to Disney Wild Animal Park
76. Get an account on Facebook
77. Watch a Marky Mark movie with Jennifer while we drink strawberry daiquiris
78. Visit the Park's in Alaska.
79. See 5 plays/musicals/concerts. (0/5)
80. Find a Charity I am passionate about and help them raise money.
81. Participate in Gimme your Stuff
82. Send PostCarts in Post Crossing (0/5)
83. Exercise for health, not to maintain some unrealistic goal for myself.
84. learn to love myself, my body, and mind, even though there are countless flaws.
85. Know that having a few jiggles here and there doesn't make me unlovable.
86. Exercise regularly 3x per week. (0/
87. Run a 5K
88. Get a perfect score on my next fitness test.
89. Laser Hair Removal
90. Do pictures for at least 5 groups of people. They can be family, wedding, kids. (0/5)
91. Stop buying bottled water. Get a filter for work so I can use a cup instead.
    
92. Continue to be a nonsmoker and encourage my patients to quit.
93. Have Joe and I both make "bucket lists"
94. Make a list of 100 things I love.
95. Go Hiking at least 10 times. (0/10)
96. Go to the DMZ.
97. Make Joe a new quilt.
98. Wear heels at least once per month. (0/32)
99. Go to the Florida Keys
100. Write in my blog once per week.
     

Happy New Year

I spent the New Year at the ER working. Normally we have 2-3 drunks per night, so for New Years I was expecting an invasion. Robert was nice enough that he came in to help out. Surprisingly it was really slow. In fact the only patient we had before midnight was Jordy! Yes it's true, my son was the only patient.

Joe called me and said that Jordy was running a really high temp that wasn't coming down with Tylenol and Motrin. Then Jordy was letting out some blood curdling screams and shaking. I told him to come in immediately.

Luckily Robert was already there so I didn't have to pin down Jordy and look in his ear myself. I don't like to be Jordy's doctor, just his mommy! He had an ear infection! I was really surprised! I hope that this isn't going to be a recurring problem.

Now we are giving him Amoxicillin twice a day. It is quite traumatic for everyone involved. Jordy is freakishly strong and fights us. I feel like we are killing him as he sputters and tries to spit it out. Last night Joe brought him to see me at the ER and we had one of the nurses give it to him. He actually did much better with the nurse than us!

Only 7 more days of antibiotics to go....it's gonna be a long week!

I resolve to...

It is only two days until the New Year. This year I have all kinds of goals. Here is a brief run down.


Work Goals:
-Become member of AAFP and read the entire journal monthly
-Renew ACLS
-Read that ER book

Family
-Date Night at least once per month
-Find regular baby sitter for Jordy for date night
-Take Jordy to playgroup whenever I am off work
-Menu planning so that we don't waste so much food

Financial
-Do Monthly Budget & meet it!
-Start saving for Jordy for college
-Increase savings for retirement
-Save “Enough” for down payment for house in Florida (not sure how much "enough" is)

Personal Enrichment
-Find masters program
-Start Masters program
-Stop Swearing!

Fitness
-Get Body Fat Measured
-Work out 3x per week
-Give up the fantasy that I will ever look like Giselle or Heidi Klum & love myself anyways!

Friends
-Call my friends and family regularly



While I am resolving to do all this stuff, let's just take a look back at my last years resolutions!


1. get back to my preprego weight of 140

2. exercise at least 5x per week

3. Read one book per month for fun

4. Complete my Senior Project and do that damned presentation I have been dreading

5.Pass the Family Medicine Boards

6.Read the Bible in it's Entirety

7. Learn about History so I don't feel like such a moron

8. Make sure that Joe and I have once a week date night

9.Read Swanson's Family Medicine Review book by June
10. Continue to be a nonsmoker

11. Scrapbook more


Well I haven't completed a few of them...I didn't read the Bible, learn History, and Joe and I are slacking a bit on the date night since moving to South Korea. But I did get down to my pre-prego weight, scrapbook a lot, read Swanson's, haven't touched a cigarette, read a ton of books, but I don't find out if I passed boards for another two weeks.

The Waste Report

Today, rather than telling you how much we wasted (which as usual was a considerable amount), I wanted to tell you what I saved!

Since I had a lot of turkey left over from Christmas dinner, plus drippings for broth- I decided to make soup!

In addition to the turkey we had left over noodles from spaghetti, cilantro from salsa, and celery too!

I mixed it all together, added some water and spices....then voila! Turkey soup!

Rather than throw away all that stuff, the soup provided us with at least one more meal! I feel so accomplished!

I love my Wii Fit

For Christmas Joe got me the Wii Fit, or actually my mother-in-law got it for me since she is the one who sent Joe the money. Thanks Aida!

Anyways, I love the thing. It has all kinds of fun "games" on it that are exercises in disguise. The balance games are really fun and you unlock more as you go, motivating you to keep going. The cardio section has running, and there is a cute running track that you go along. There is also a strength section and a yoga section. All of it is pretty good. Today I did 40 minutes of exercise and it felt like I was just playing the whole time- but I was actually sweaty and stinky too!

By far my favorite part of the Wii fit is the body fit test. It weighs you, yes the balance board is also a scale! Then it keeps track of it from day to day. It is motivating to see how your weight changes from day to day. One part I don't like about the Wii Fit is that it accused me of being a Wii Fit age of nearly 15 years older than I am, then gave me no instructions or recommendations on how to get younger!

Joe also got me another Wii fitness type game/exercise program. It is called My Fitness Coach. That one is really good too. It doesn't use the balance board, which is kind of good and bad. Not using it allows you to do all kinds of jumping and other cardio. The fitness test on this one is really good and has you do all kinds of exercises then recommends a program for you.

The workouts with the Fitness Coach can get a little boring as she doesn't put them into aerobic routines like a real workout program. She just does random aerobic moves; grapevine x2, then lunges, then step-touch...it gets kind of boring. Luckily though I usually have to dodge Jordy while I am trying to workout, so that does keep me on my toes!

Oh on the Wii Fit, Jordy seems to really enjoy the cartoon look of the people and the funny noises it makes. This allows me to exercise a tiny bit longer b/c he is entertained.

Since I failed so miserably at Operation Stork Attack, my goal to get in crazy good shape for Hawaii, I am hoping all this new fitness stuff will help me at least get in shape in time for Florida (hey I am being realistic!)

Jordy's new Hot Rod

Joe and I were talking about how when each of us was little we really wanted a Power Wheels, but never got one. Then we swore we would get Jordy one when he was old enough. But then we saw them and couldn't resist. I was worried that Jordy wouldn't be able to drive it, b/c well he is just a baby...but we found a guy on the side of the road-really the side of the road- selling these!

And the best part is that they are remote controlled! We just put Jordy in and drive him around. It is so much fun! We went for a walk yesterday and just drove him along side of us. He really seemed to enjoy it. He honks the horn and turns on and off the little blinkers!




Here is a picture of our entire fleet- my fancy new 1995 Kia that I found for a whopping 850 bucks, the CRV, and Jordy's new ride!



Today we couldn't take out the car because it is too cold- we actually got about 2" of snow. Finally I got to dress Jordan up in his little Weebok snow boots that light up when he walks. He didn't quite understand what the snow was and tried to eat the entire yard full of snow.

Another day...

Jordy one year ago!

Today was another day at work. Nothing much exciting happened. Nothing remarkable. It just kind of drug on and on.

It made me really want to get the hell out of this freezing cold country (although Omaha isn't any warmer). I am so excited to get to Florida. Everday I spend hours and hours looking at houses for sale on hotpads.com and get excited to have more than two outlets in my kitchen, have a garbage disposal, a washer AND a dryer, normal trash service... OOOHHH the day!

I miss my mom and dad. It was so nice seeing them in Hawaii. Jordy loved all the extra attention.

Christmas is in three days! I have given Joe most of his presents already, there isn't a lot left for him to open on Christmas. We did get Jordy a pretty cool gift, but I admit that it was mostly for us rather than him. I will post pics of it soon!

Joe has started tutoring people at my work. One of the nurses needed help with Organic Chemistry so he agreed to help her. Then people started coming out of the woodwork needing tutoring. Hopefully it will support his pretty serious video game habit! Additionally I am starting to really enjoy the Wii! So much fun! It is pretty addictive!

Parenting is NOT for the faint of heart

Today I was at work when I got a panicked call from Joe wondering if
he should come into the ER for evaluation.

Apparently there had been an incident at home.

Last night we had enchiladas with homemade salsa for dinner. Little
Jordykins really likes to eat tortilla chips just barely dipped in the
salsa. The only problem is he doesn't really understand how to hold
onto the chip. After a few nibbles, he crushes it in his hands. The
end result is tortilla chip crumbs sprinkled all around our house.

Jordy then likes to pick up the tortilla chips, suck on them until they
are soggy, then force feed them to either Joe or I. He is pretty
relentless in his forcefeeding. He will keep jamming it in your face
until you finally succumb to the soggy chip feeding.

Well, today Joe was watching tv and Jordy was eating one of the chips,
sucking the life out of it apparently. Then Jordy crawled up on the
couch next to Joe and began to force feed it to him. Since Joe was in
the middle of something on the tv, Laker game maybe?, he just opened
his mouth and welcomed the soggy chip....only it wasn't a chip.

Immediately Joe sensed it was something quite different.... POOP!

Jordy had somehow gotten a pebble of his poop, sucked on it till it was
good and mushy, then jammed it in Joe's mouth!

Joe immediately began spitting and wiping his mouth and shouting.

Jordy thought this was great and began smiling, laughing, and applauding in
earnest!

When I asked how Jordy was doing, Joe informed me that he had no idea
as he had been brushing his teeth for the last thirty minutes.

He checked on Jordy, and he was fine watching tv. Joe, however, will be
permanently traumatized.

I'm doing my part...

I keep hearing that the key to economic turn around is consumers. To support this goal I have bought several items in the past few weeks- okay, okay, I bought it all because I wanted it (please see previous post on my consumerism)

Video games have never really been that interesting to me until a few weeks ago when I heard about a game on the Wii. So while in Hawaii, I found the game and broke down and bought the Wii and all the accessories I needed. I love it! What is the game you ask? Well it is a little embarassing....it is All Star Cheer Squad! I love it! It is so much fun! My inner cheerleader is busting out! Tonight I made it through the tryouts, and yes I did make the squad!!

I was interested in the Wii Fit, but haven't been able to find a balance board here in Korea. I keep checking at the base, but no dice yet. Joe got me a similar game, it is the Personal Trainer. Tonight I did the first workout on it, and it was pretty good! It tracks your progress and adjusts to your fitness goals. Hopefully it will help me not become a flabby mess!

Speaking of flabby messes- I do remember my promise to post a sexy picture of myself in Hawaii...and plan to make good on that promise. I will post them as soon as my dad sends me the pics.

I'm Baaack...

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

It has been a long time since I have written, and that must have been disappointing for my one regular reader (thanks Kameron!)

We are back from Hawaii, and yes I took boards. After taking it I really am worried if I passed or not. The entire test was more like Trivial Pursuit than a real exam. For several hours I sat staring at a computer screen answering random factoid questions about nothing of signifigance. I hope that I am not doing this again in July- although maybe we could work in another vacation in a fun place.

As for Hawaii- I was somewhat disappointed at the island. My testing site was on Oahu, so I didn’t have much of a choice there. People always rave about Hawaii so I had some pretty high expectations… but it wasn’t the paradise I had envisioned.
Coming from South Korea, Joe and I were pretty excited to see lots of stores, and Oahu did deliver in that regard. We went frequently to Best Buy and Walmart! One day we spent over 2 hours in traffic- a real surprise to us!

My parents and best friends flew out to see us, and it was great to see them. My mom was so anxious to see Jordy, and even watched him the entire night prior to my test so I could be well rested. It was so nice!

I didn’t get to spend quite as much time with Jenn and Adam as I would have liked, but didn’t want to bombard them with my company either! They were really interested in seeing every aspect of the island-which is hard to do with a child in tow. Frankly after that test, I was content to sit on my beach and watch Jordy play in the sand!
We did do quite a few fun things while in Hawaii. We saw huge waves at North Shore, played in the water, went to several really nice resteraunts, went to Best Buy and Walmart (which after Korea was heaven!), and my personal favorite was the submarine!
Right outside of our hotel there was an Atlantis submarine. I really wanted to go but didn’t want to spend the 95dollars per person to go. Finally Joe convinced me that I would regret it if we didn’t go. When we were paying we found out that they did a military discount! Half Price! So we went, and then later in the day, I went again with my dad! We saw so much stuff; 3 reef sharks, 7 sea turtles, countless fish, an eel- it was wonderful!

The trip back was rough. For some reason it only took 7 hours to get there, and over 10 to fly back. By the time we got home, I was exhausted. I thought I had the day of when we got back, but b/c of the date change I didn’t. So I had about 5 hours of sleep before I had to be at work. And of course it was a crazy busy day- I saw 25 patients!

ER Drunk Guy

Last night at work, we got a 911 phone call from a guy who said, "I've had too much to drink...mumbles mumbles" click...

The techs were able to track where the phone call, and away they went in the ambulance to go get him.

We anxiously awaited the arrival of some drunken idiot, or worse some unconscious idiot...but when they returned- the guy came walking in all on his own, was totally sober, and coherent.

He apparently didn't know who had made the phone call. There were several people at his dorm room drinking, but they all had left.

So we didn't really know what to do. At first I thought we needed to send the ambulance out to go find the drunk guy, but the nurse and the techs talked me out of it. They said it would be like going door to door trying to find a drunk guy to bring in. How would we ever know which drunk guy it was that actually made the call?

In the end, we took the guy back to his room, and kind of forgot it happened. The nurse assured me this is the way it was to be handled....apparently she was wrong. I got a good talking to this morning, and again this evening...

I thought the whole thing was kind of dumb, and to be honest I agreed with the techs who didn't want to go door to door. We can only do so much! If we went to the place where the phone call came from and no one in need of medical attention was there, is it really our obligation to hunt down some drunk guy to treat?

Overall the night was pretty exciting, with a seizure patient and a croup patient, and some patient with knee pain for several weeks who suddenly at 3am decided that was the moment she had to be treated. So she got up at 3am, yes 3am, and got dressed, braved the 20 degree weather, and came to the ER. It was quite the emergency and I gave her some ibuprofen. Thank god she came in, otherwise she would have woken up totally fine in the morning and been well rested!

At least I have tonight off, but it is back to the salt mine tomorrow night, and the night after that.
We leave for Hawaii in one week! Yeah! But, I take my test in one week- boo!

Want, Want, Want

I am always wanting...

I would like to be one of those really frugal people, that can live on practically nothing. Certainly you know the type. Those are the people who only shop at the goodwill and are perfectly satisfied with their one pair of pants, and one shirt they have in the closet. They don't seem to care about the newest trends or new technology. The television they watch is an archaic throw back to the 1950's, but it works for them and they are perfectly happy with it. Cable tv? Never even thought about it, bunny ears will do just fine.

They are the type of people who don't want stuff b/c your stuff ends up owning you. I remember when I was in Jr. High we moved to a new house. My dad was so paranoid to "leave the house alone". One day while he and my mom were out, I also left the house. So for a period of about 4 hours not a soul was home. My poor dad was furious and thought that a team of crooks were waiting to ambush the house. Thankfully nothing was stolen.

From that day I remember thinking I wanted to be the complete opposite. I would not let my stuff control what I do, where I go, and in general run my life. My life would not been spent in the acquisition of useless junk. My main pasttime is shopping. There are so many things that I want right now it is ridiculous. Somehow I find more and more stuff that I NEED!

I wear uniforms to work everyday, but that doesn't stop me from wanting all kinds of clothes. I want a new watch that will monitor my heart rate and caloric expenditure. I want new furniture for Jordy's room because I feel guilty he is still sleeping in a pack-n-play since we got to Korea. I want new sheets b/c I accidently got bleach on my favorite set and now they look bad. I want, I want, I want.

It is really depressing to me that I want all of this stuff. I am proud though that I am able to control myself (most of the time) and not buy everything in sight. Joe makes it even harder by constantly saying, "You deserve it honey, you work so hard". Who could resist that?

Thankfully I don't let the stuff run my life. If someone came in here and robbed us blind, I would definitely recover- plus then I would be able to go shopping for more stuff. Come to think of it maybe we should leave our doors unlooked....

Things that are on my mind...

Things I am really happy about right now:

• My little Jordy, he is so cute! He learns so much everyday and is starting to really talk more. He says Hi and Bye accompanied by a wave.
  
• My Job. I really enjoy it, except for the night shift...I love the guys that I work with- we have a lot of fun together. Eric, Travis, and Trent have become like brothers to me. I really feel lucky to have them as friends, and privileged that I get to know their families too!
  
• Getting to go to Hawaii and see my mom & dad & Jenn & Adam next month.
• Joe & I are getting our finances together. We actually have a spending plan!
• Being married. I love coming home to Joe everyday. After 7 years of marriage and 9 years together, I can't believe that we still get along so well! I am so glad that I said, "I do".
  

Things I am excited about:

• Moving to Florida and getting a house with a yard. I want to start gardening and can't wait to get Pezzy (my little schnauzer) back.
• Having a garbage disposal again! Having more than two outlets in the kitchen. Having a regular heating system- here the heat comes from the floor! Getting a bed that doesn't feel like a rock.
  
• I can't wait to have another baby. Joe is not sure that we can handle another little terror, but I am ready!
• Passing boards next month (hopefully).

Things that I am worried about:

• Boards. I take the big test in two weeks. I really haven't studied as much as I should. It is hard to study since I feel like nothing I will study will actually be on the test!

Things I am sad about:

• Being so far away from our families. It is hard to be away and miss so much. I miss hearing all the news from everyone.
  
• Not talking to Heidi, my sister, often enough. She has been so busy that she never calls me anymore...
• Not reaching my sexy goal, AKA Operation Stork Attack. I wanted to be sexy in Hawaii, but I think that people will think I am a land cow when I get there. I full intended on working out regularly, but that kind of fell apart once we got to Korea. It was really hard to go to the gym here. I just feel really bad coming home and then leaving Joe again to go to the gym. I tried to do some work out videos at home, but wasn't very dedicated. In a way I did reach my goal- I am back to my pre-prego weight, but it looks nothing like it used to :( Much more jiggly :( Joe and I have decided to shoot for a new goal- be as fat as we can in Hawaii. To kick of this goal we have eaten like pigs today. I made a pumpkin cheesecake with a pound of butter and 4, yes 4, packages of full fat cream cheese. In addition to a slice of this, Joe also ate a small tub of Ben and Jerry's. We are well on our way to fatdom...
  
• Jordy growing up so fast. I want to savor every moment with him. The other day I was at work and I called Joe to see what he was up to. Joe was putting Jordy into his "jammies" and getting ready for bed. I was so sad that I was missing everything. I do enjoy my job, but really want to be here to take care of Jordy.

Working the Night Shift...

I don't know how people do it. I worked the last two nights and it was hell. Everyone kept telling me how slow it would be, that I would have tons of time to study for boards, I would be so bored they said... WRONG!!

We were so busy both nights. Everytime I would even think about laying down on my office floor- seriously there is no call room!- they would come in and wake me up again. It was pretty much non-stop the entire time.

It is pretty sad to look in my office. There is an exercise mat that someone left in there and an old wool blanket. I roll the mat out and use the blanket. Hey when you get desperate, you will do anything! Unfortunately I didn't get much sleep d/t constant patients and constant questions regarding my orders. Apparently I stuttered when I wrote the orders down...so frustrating when the nurses just ask a billion questions, "Are you sure you want to do this, what about this, what about that?" Seriously my patience was wearing thin... murderous rage building...

Then this morning they had a recall and everyone had to come in. I didn't mind that part since I was already there- it was kind of nice to have all the company for the last part of my shift. But then I had to stay an hour later until we were released. I was dead for the day. Joe watched Jordy and did a really good job of keeping him quiet. He had to confiscate his new favorite toe- the push-corn popper dealie (not sure what the real name is for it!). Jordy found it at the Bx and pushed it around the store for an hour and a half while we shopped. We ended up buying it for him b/c it made him so happy!

As soon as we got it home I wished we hadn't gotten it. That thing is so shockingly loud in our house. It didn't seem so bad in the store with all the other noise going on, but now it is like a machine gun going off constantly. To make it worse Jordy can't push it in a straight line so he periodically picks it up and slams it back down in front of him...it is so loud! We have to yell at eachother to communicate! At least Jordy is entertained!

So since I am on this night schedule, now I don't know whether I should stay up all night tonight and sleep tomorrow, or go back to a normal schedule. But I work Thursday night, then Friday night off, then Saturday and Sunday night....

Waste Report

Well this week I didn't do much better. Partly b/c last week I didn't clean out the crisper, which many years ago my dad renamed, "The Rotter". Unfortunately it's tendency to rot food has carried onto my household as well.

Pictured here you will see all my good intentions of eating good. I full intended on eating celery sticks (bottom right of picture), salads (which I actually had a few as evidenced by the partially eaten lettuce). I planned on eating cucumbers with my salads, but forgot they were there...

I accidently bought too much cilantro for a recipe and meant to make some salsa with it...but forgot. This one really pisses me off since at the commissary cilatro is 2.50 a bunch!! In the states we got 3 bunches for a dollar!

In the back of the photo is a tv dinner for babies that Jordy would spit out everytime we forced him to take a bite.

There is also a jug of some Korean drink that I thought was aloe morning- not the same. It is "Be Original" and is not quite as yummy as the Aloe Morning. The Aloe Morning has a yummy tropical flavor and tastes like the carribean (if you can imagine that).

Anyways, I can't add up how much all this waste has cost me this week. Partly b/c I just polished off a bottle of wine and no longer have the ability to add two numbers together. Also b/c sadly, this picture does not detail all the waste we actually incurred. Today I tried to make a salad out of some lettuce that looked okay in the bag, but when I got it out it was pretty slimy :(

For my birthday I asked Joe for Quicken. Being the wonderful husband that he is, he got it for me instantly. I have been learning how to use it. It is harder than I thought. My friend at work has a genius wife who is a financial wizard. Katie is helping me get my finances in order and become a responsible money manager. She actually tracks every penny they have and has a yearly budget! I don't know how she does it! Maybe someday I will actually know how much money is in my bank account at any given time. Interestingly enough, she did suggest the "envelope system" until we get the hang of it! Joe and I rolled laughing explaining that Joe's mom LOVES the envelopes!

I will keep you posted on the evolution of the budget and the waste report...

My baby boy...getting so big so fast!

It has been a while since I have written much about the ever changing Jordy.

He is now 14 months old. I think he is about 28lbs (just a guess though as I don't own a scale). He is getting really tall and can take things off of our table, and on his tip toes can take things off the kitchen counter. Most of the time when he pulls things off the kitchen counter it is disastrous- pulling down plates of food or sharp knives. Luckily we have had no casualties yet.

Jordy has three teeth!! I know, I know it is a miracle! About three weeks ago he started to get his lower left front tooth, then the top front two popped out. Poor guy has been miserable. I think that all his teeth are gonna pop out now pretty quick. I am amazed he made it this long with no teeth. Actually I was started to get a little worried as his little cousin Isabella practically has a full set of choppers- including molars!

Jordy still isn't a big talker. He says Bye-Bye with a wave. A few times he has said hi, but not too often. He says momma and dada. But despite the endless babble that comes out of his mouth, no other actual words.

He really enjoys pushing buttons. Our dishwasher makes all kinds of fun noises with every button push. He keeps turning on the dishwasher to all these crazy cycles.

Joe and I are constantly being stalked by Jordy holding up books. He loves to be read to, but doesn't have the attention span to make it through the entire book (all 3-4 pages of a board book!).

He loves when Joe does his crazy scream. Jordy will stop whatever he is doing and just let out a big hearty laugh. It is adorable. Whenever he does this in public (the laugh, not Joe's scream) everyone smiles and laughs with him.

His favorite food is by far hot dogs. He sees us making one and he goes bezerk! He screams until he is served the whole thing. Then he dives in with both hands shoveling little hot dog bits into his mouth! For a while he loved grapes, but that obsession had died down a bit. Chocolate is another favorite, but we don't give him too much of that.

Jordy Bugs Laugh

Jordy used to love the bath, then for some reason he got really scared of it. For about two weeks whenever we would put him in there he would scream bloody murder.

So we tried to make it fun again for him. We taught him to throw stuff out of the tub, and Joe screams, and Jordy laughs so hard! Of course we end up soaked at the end of the bath, but at least Jordy isn't screaming!

The Waste Report

Right now there is a package of hamburger that has gone bad in my refrigerator. It was only 2.00 b/c it was in the reduced bin at the commissary, but still it was wasteful. Last Sunday I took it out of the freezer with the intent of making a meatloaf. It was defrosted when I came home from work on Monday, but I was so tired I didn't make it.

Then Tuesday Joe picked me up and had got Burger King for us, yummy! So I didn't make the meatloaf.

Wednesday I had the day off so I had fully intended on making meatloaf, but didn't do it.

Now, Thursday, I am afraid of the meat. It has kind of turned a funny brown color. SCARY!

Normally I would just toss it out and move on with my life, but today I am realizing how much we waste. Joe and I are pretty awful when it comes to food. We will make a meal and never eat the left overs. Nearly every time I open the fridge I find various foods in different stages of the decay process.

And it is not just food, we buy a lot of things that we never use. For instance Joe and I bought a baby carrier that was supposed to be a little backpack carrier. After one trip Joe said it was the most uncomfortable thing to wear, and Jordy hated it. So we never use it. Thank goodness it was only cost 20 dollars.

So I would like to keep a weekly update of all the things and money we have wasted.

This week:

1. 1lb hamburger meat- 2.00
2. Portable Crib (couldn't find mattress that fit it- wondering if I should spend additional $ to have mattress shipped here, or just stash it away and not use it, or sell it)- 50.00
3. Bedding for the Crib- 54.00
4. Accidently turned the heat up too high and had to open all the windows b/c we were roasting- Unknown $

Well that is all I can think of this week (so far), but that totals at least 110 bucks!

Maybe next week will be better.

Never say Never

Yesterday as I was pacing around the hospital in full chemical warfare gear, huffing and puffing in my gas mask, I can't believe my life has taken me here.

I remember in high school there were three things I knew I would never do. Number one was get married. Marriage signified the end. Once you were married you were locked in, no more variety, no more fun. A husband would only hold me down, keep me from achieving my goals, and overall make me miserable. Turns out I was wrong on that one. Once I found Joe, I didn't know instantly he was the one. But after he stood by me through some really hard times, I still didn't know. Luckily Joe didn't give up easy and after cancelling our wedding- not once, but twice....we finally did it! I couldn't be happier. Being married hasn't stopped me from achieving anything. Joe has only made my dreams possible. Without him I don't think I would have finished medical school, or residency.

The second thing I was sure I would never do was have children. If getting married locked you down, children were a million times worse. I didn't want to worry about kids and raising them properly. When Joe and I finally got married we agreed- absolutely no children! Then after delivering several babies at work, I started to think more and more about it. Then I think biology took over and then I really wanted them. Fortunately Joe really likes kids and was willing to compromise on the issue. Now that we have Jordan, I can't imagine life without him.

Everyday I look forward to seeing what new tricks Jordan has learned, what new thing he will do, and what he will destroy. The funny thing about it is that I don't even care what he breaks-most of the time!

The third and final thing I would do was join the military. I was sure that this would be an awful decision and I would regret it terribly. And pretty much I was wrong about everything, except this rule. The military does suck completely. I can't wait to get out.

My first Exercise

At our base we do these exercises quite frequently. We pretend that we are actually at war and go through all the procedures that we would do in the event of a catastrophe. This week has been quite exciting. At work we had to wear all of our Chem Gear over our regular uniform, carry our gas masks and be ready to put it on at a moments notice. Yesterday we ended being in MOPP 4 (wearing everything; gas mask, rubber gloves, rubber boots, chem suit, hood, kevlar helmet) for about 90 minutes. Plus when we go outside we have to wear a FLACC vest which is really heavy, and I don't even have the bullet proof plates in mine! Then during that time we had to "bug out", and evacuate the entire hospital. It is really hard to see wearing our gas masks. It is kind of like walking in a tunnel with no peripheral vision.

After about an hour in the gas mask I thought I was gonna pass out. I was sweating like a pig, my lenses on the gas mask were fogging, and I just wanted to sit down. Finally I sat down and started to close my eyes. Then I thought, If I pass out, I could really die in this mask and no one would realize it. I forced myself to open my eyes and concentrate on taking big deep breaths. Finally they announced the all clear and we could take them off.

I don't know how I would ever be able to actually work and treat patients in all that crap!

Thank goodness I am off work today and tomorrow. I have to work on Friday, but that is the last day of the exercise so hopefully it will be all wound down by then.

I hate all this exercise stuff, but it is nice that if we ever actually had to do it we are prepared. They pretty much make us do it so often, that when it happen for real it wouldn't be any shocker, just another day at work!

Halloween

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Our "Romantic" Anniversary

October 27th is our anniversary. This year we celebrated 7 years of wedded bliss in the most unusual way.

Originally I had intended on buying Joe a remote control helicopter (he has been wanting one since Geoff Cooper got one) and taking it to a park to fly it. But plans changed when I got the stomach flu last week and never had a chance to go buy it. Then our car starting making this funny noise and wasn't turning corners very well. We went to the repair guy on base who didn't know what the problem was- and also wouldn't talk to me about it, he actually asked to talk to "my husband". I called Joe over from the lobby by exclaiming "My tiny woman brain just possibly couldn't understand!"

I did some investigating and figured out (yes my tiny woman brain worked) that it was the rear differential that needed attending.

So instead of a leisurely day flying helicopters we decided to go to Seoul to get maps loaded onto our GPS system and get fluid to change our rear differential.

Several people I had talked to at the base said there was a Garmin store in Seoul. I asked where, and the said to take the bus to Yongsan and any cab driver would know. Well apparently that was wrong. We asked a cab driver who had no idea. Joe had called a friend of ours and think that he heard "garment" store because his directions ended us in Itaewon (eee-tay-won), which Joe kept calling "Itchy-Taiwan", where there were tons of clothing stores. We combed the streets for about two hours asking every white person we saw about GPS, no one had any idea.

Joe then thought we should head back to the base and go to the PX and ask them where they sell their GPS units. Once at the PX, no one had any idea. Then we headed to the library and registered to use their internet. Once on the internet we were able to find the website for the place, but it was all in Korean. Joe asked the librarian to interpret for us. He looked on several maps and wrote directions down on a piece of paper in Korean.



We took the directions to the cab driver- who nodded and off we went. For all we know the directions could have said, "These are stupid American's. Take them for a long ride and then rob them." Luckily though we actually ended up at the Garmin store.

At the Garmin store the guy was really nice and loaded our maps onto our unit. Joe then asked him to write down directions to the Honda dealership. I really just wanted to call it a day. It was already 4pm and I was exhausted. But we decided to stick it out and finish the mission...we pressed on...

We sat in the cab for a long time in rush our traffic. The Koreans really love their heaters and we were sweating in the backseat. Finally I couldn't take it and cracked the window. Jordy had a good time hanging his head out the window like a puppy.

Finally we got to the Honda dealer. It was quite a scene trying to explain to a Korean mechanic what the problem was when no one there spoke fluent english. It was like playing charades! Finally the mechanic pretended to crank over a stearing wheel and then bump up and down in his seat while making a grinding noise. "Hooray" we screamed! That is it!

Then they brought out two quarts of rear differential fluid and loaded it into our stroller and we rolled away!

We had dinner at Sizzler (yes they have a Sizzler) and then headed back to the bus station for our hour ride back to Osan.

Victorious we disembarked our bus and headed home. I told Joe he sure knows how to show a girl a good time. Our most memorable anniversary yet!

Eye Glasses for under 10 bucks!

I heard about a website that has eye glasses you can order for under 10 dollars a pair!

The website is zennioptical.com

I haven't personally ordered from there, but intend to considering I have never got a pair of glasses for less than 150bucks!

Come be my Follower

This is a call for followers!

I work so hard to come up with witty fun to read updates of our adventures here in South Korea, but wonder if anyone reads it!

So right now, look to the right of this posting and see where it says "Follow this Blog". Just click and the darned thing and become a follower will ya?

Thanks to Kameron and my mommy who are already my two followers.

The Plague

Me in my Chem Suit, with my glasses on the outside so I can see!

At work on Thursday, I felt so tired. I just couldn't wake up. Three cups of coffee and nothing. Then I started to feel really nauseated. So nauseated that I started to wonder if I had taken my birth control properly. The last time I felt that awful was when I was prego! I took a prego test on the down low and it was negative. Actually in that short time that I wondered if I was prego, I got really excited about that thought.

About two hours later after draining a butt abscess (I feel so bad for that guy- such a nice sweet young man with this slow healing thing on his butt), I started to feel awful. Robert had gone to a meeting and I was alone. Finally I realized things were on a downward spiral and asked the techs to call Robert back.

He was there instantly and before I knew what hit me, I was hooked up to an IV and getting some Zofran (a miracle drug that fixes nausea without making you too fatigued). I called Joe and he came to get me. Once at home I was in bed and didn't feel too bad. I actally had wondered if maybe I had over reacted.

Joe went to the market to get some diapers for Jordy, and some gatorade for me. Almost the exact moment he was riding down the elevator away from ear shot, the bomb hit!

I was in bed and felt it like a mack truck hitting me- intense nausea, gagging, swirling in my head..it was awful.

I jumped up and ran to the bathroom. Miraculously I made it to the bathroom door, was able to aim appropriately at the toilet, and let loose with explosive vomiting of some stuff I don't even remember eating. The only flaw- the toilet lid was down! I then had the intense pleasure of watching my vomit ricochet off the curved lid literally ALL OVER the BATHROOM!!

It was just awful. But that didn't end it. There was more in my tummy. I grabbed a pile of laundry and sat on that while I finished the business of completely emptying my stomach, and much of my small intestine I imagine.

When Joe finally returned I had him put the stuff in the washer since it was now covered in my gastric juices.

I laid back down and Joe told me I was the messiest sick person ever. He is right. Everytime I get sick I never make it to the bathroom. Thank goodness he is such a good sport and helps clean up the aftermath!

If only I kept this outfit at home to clean up the disaster! This is our chem suits to wear in the event of chemical warfare. I think it would also do well for the stomach flu!

Trent, me, Eric

Work Rant

Okay I have seriously had it.

Today at work I was pushed to my limit. The military has wasted my time
yet again. I wish I could say it was the last time, but I am sure that
tomorrow I will waste another several hours, reinventing the wheel yet
again.

The military is so damned obsessed with training. They are always
training us for something. It would be one thing if this was useful
training, but most of the time it really doesn't pertain to my job, or
my day to day duties. They military M.O. for this training is randomly
emailing you and saying you are due to complete this training- in the
next FIVE MINUTES!!! So go right now to this website and do it- or you
will be in trouble!!

So you drop everything, go to some random website to complete the
training that is only due once per year, and somehow you are just
finding out five minutes before you are about to be overdue. Patients
are piling up while you go to the website, you computer locks you out,
you have to call systems to get you back in. Patients are leaving b/c
they are mad they haven't been seen. Techs and nurses keep stopping by
your office to tell you that patients have been waiting...

You finally make it to the site and login. Error, log in ID not
recognized. You try again...nope doesn't like that one either. Great,
now you are locked out of that site too. But not to worry they will
email you a password in 72 hours...crap you will be expired by that
time.

Thankfully the password comes through almost immediately to your email
account. It gives you a temporary login and password to use. Back to
the site...try again- VICTORY....almost.

Now they want you to answer a series of questions to prove that it is
you. You answer all the questions, but it says some of the answers are
wrong. Some idiot has put your info into the system wrong and there are
major issues with not having a middle initial. Ten minutes on the phone
to get this error corrected...ten minutes of listening to "don't drink
and drive, always have a wingman, gay is not okay in the military..."
okay so that last one isn't really in there...

Back to the site again..."Dr. Carter, you have three patients waiting,
one is having crushing substernal chest pain with radiation to the left
arm and taste of metal in his mouth"...can't worry about that now, you
have training to do!

So finally at the site, logged in, ready to get down to some serious
learning. Five thousand six hundred and fifty two powerpoint slides
later, you are comatose, have learned nothing, but print out your
certificate- at least 2000 copies for everyone who will want it.

So you email back the person who wanted the certificate, put your copy
away and think that is the end of it. But no, up to two months later
people are hitting you up for the exact date you took this stupid
course. It wouldn't be so bad if it was one course, but they military
has one for everything and I am not kidding; Hazmat, Environment of
Care, Laws of Armed Conflict, Human Traficking, Homosexuality, Infection
Control, HIPAA, CBRNE, ORM (which I haven't even figured out what this
is yet), Hand Shaking, Ass Kissing, Butt Wiping, it can really get
ridiculous.

Then there is not a unified system for this record keeping. Since I
inprocessed here I have had to do so much training my head will explode.
Everytime I turn around, somebody else wants me to put all my
information into their data base. It is not enough that Medical
Readiness went through all my stuff and updated their system, then
Education and Training did the same and gave me a nice summary showing
all the dates for stuff, then the training monitor in the ER wanted me
to fill in all the exact same dates for her in her Excel data sheet,
then today (what instigated this rant) I got another folder in my
mailbox that wants me to fill in all the dates again!!

Are you kidding me? Do you realize I have probably spent at least 20
hours doing this? Why are so many people doing the exact same thing. I
am glad to see that my tax payer dollars are hard at work employing at
least ten people to do the EXACT SAME THING!!!

What a waste of my time.

Just Go Here!

This isn't actually the kid, the real kid was much bigger. I found this on the internet
apparently this practice is common in a lot of places...

Today Joe, Jordy, and I went grocery shopping. On the way back from the commisary, we drove out the main gate of the base to the main street of in Songtan. As we were driving down the street there was a kid about 10years old standing with his mother at the bus stop.

From down the street as we were driving towards him, it looked like he was pouring something out. When we got close I realized, and saw everything, that he was peeing right into the street!! I screamed and pointed.

Now remember this is a busy street, there are tons of people walking up and down the street, cars driving by...tons of people everywhere! There is also a big building right behind him with an alley that I am sure would have been a much more private place to do his business...but no, he decided to just go there.

Joe said several other people have told him this is common practice, even for women! This is the first I have seen of it, and was floored. I actually saw his "junk"!!

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Trash Nazi

At our apartment complex has these management guys who stay out in this booth in our parking lot. There is someone who is there all at all times. I think they are supposed to be security, but really I would feel a lot more secure if they would just go away.

We are supposed to sort our trash, which in theory sounds like a good idea. I feel like we are saving the planet, but lately I feel like we are just getting yelled at.

Every time we head out to the trash pile, which is right at the front of our building (very unattractive) the little security man comes tearing out of his little booth to investigate. While we sort our trash he hovers over us making sure it is done appropriately. One time the guy yelled at Joe saying we were in violation and that he would report us to the authorities.

And when I say we have to sort our trash, I truly mean we have to SORT OUR TRASH! They want everything separated. In order to do this completely correctly we would have to have 19 different trash bins in our house...

Finally we have given up. We now pile up our trash and take it to the base like the rest of the Americans. I feel like we are failures, but my life is much easier! I will continue with the American tradition of raping and pillaging the land! God Bless the USA!!

One month and counting...

We have already been here for one month. Fortunately things are starting to feel more settled. We finally got our lease signed, which means we will be getting an additional 1900 a month to pay for housing.

We also got the car completely registered...which probably took, no exaggeration here...over 8 hours of leg work. It was a ridiculous process. First we had to go to Pyeongtaek City Hall. Fortunately our friend Trent took up, because we never would have found it on our own. It is about 5 miles from our apartment and all the signs are in Korean. There are a few scattered English signs, but they suddenly stop about a mile before you actually reach the place.

Once we were there we got some wooden plates, seriously wooden- like from a tree wood! Then we went to the base got on a bus, rode it about an hour to Yongsan Army Garrison, wandered around there for several hours till we found the car place. We got the car back, with the help of a guy who was turning in his car, but still couldn't get it registered on our base. We went back to the Pass and Registration Office and waited for an hour for some guy to tell us to go back to Pyeongtaek City Hall and get permanent plates.

So we jumped in the car, confident we could find the right building again, boy were we wrong. We drove around for about an hour. Finally I pulled up to this little booth with a woman in it and asked her where city hall was. She very nicely stuck her head out of the booth and blabbered in Korean for about 2 minutes. Joe and I sat in stunned silence. Finally Joe said, Thank you, that really clears things up for us. We drove away...scared.

Just when we were about to abandon all hope, I found it! We went inside where a woman was a total bitch to us. Finally we got the metal plates, but the holes were in the wrong spots to fit on our car. A little old man drilled holes in them while I sat in the car and had a little melt down. Why are these people so mean? By the time he was done drilling holes in the plates and attaching them to our car, Joe realized I was melting down, and took over driving (he is so wonderful). He got us back home where we ate lunch.

But we still weren't done.

Back to the base Pass & Registration Office. After waiting in their crowded waiting room for another hour, and watching countless of other people who had gotten there after us get waited on, we were finally called. The guy gave us the sticker to put on the car and we were done!

Joe was shocked that we didn't have to walk over the bed of hot coals barefoot while doing the hula hoop and singing the National Anthem in the native tongue of Papua New Guinea.

It is ridiculous! But thank god we are done!

Oh Happy Day!

Today Joe and I did the most romantic thing we have ever done together. We got up early and got Jordy dressed and went to the base. Our friend Trent dropped us off at the bus station. We rode one hour to Yongsan Army Base. There we wandered around for about an hour before we found the building we wanted. Then once inside I talked to a Korean man for about ten minutes. Then he left and returned with.... OUR CAR!!!

It was heavenly sitting behind the wheel (on the normal side of the car mind you) and driving. Luckily we started talking to a guy at the vehicle place who was dropping off his car and needed a ride back to Osan. He knew directions, and we had a car! Turns out he was a really nice guy and was a treasure trove of information. It was a really nice drive back.

Once we were back to Osan we went grocery shopping and bought tons of food. We are now well stocked and have transportation! It is wonderful!

Now the only thing standing in our way of being completely settled is the lease. Unbeleivably we have been living in this apartment since the 12th and haven't signed a lease yet. The person who owns this unit is in the process of selling it, so we can't sign the lease yet. B/c we have no lease, we can't get our OHA (oversease housing allowance) which is an extra 1900.00 a month. So I really want to get that done! Hopefully it will be this week...

Work has been good. The beginning of the month my schedule is wonderful-I work one day, then three off, one day then three off. Mid month I switch to a three on- one off. I haven't seen any real emergencies in the ER yet, just lots of whiny people who don't want to got work. At least most of them are nice about it.

I have this weekend off, not sure what we are gonna do. I wanted to go on another tour, not sure if Joe is for it though...